If the Legislative Branch were...
A person: I would picture her/him as an old and feeble-minded but pompous ass.
An employee: I would recommend her/him be retired or fired.
A potential employee: Her/His resume would not make it past keywords like "initiative" and "decision-making" so (s)he would not be interviewed.
My child: I would send her/him to her/his room for petulant behavior.
A farm animal or plant: I would cull it for being unproductive.
A similar post for the Administrative Branch is a WIP.