My mom... and seeds

moonie_57February 2, 2013

It's been a rough few days... my mother had to be hospitalized an hours drive away. She will probably be there a total of 10 days while they try to find the right combination of drugs to treat her for dementia. It's looking more and more like she will not be able to go back home, which is next door to me. I have done everything I can to try to allow her to remain at home but that time has gone, I do believe. Right now she is one very unhappy person, being kept "prisoner".

I will miss her when I'm gardening. She did love being outside with me so much.

Also, I had a question about planting plumeria seed. I'm wondering how well they will sprout by being under mist. At work we start everything under mist, different things remaining under mist longer than others. I think I shall give it a try unless someone here knows for certain that they will not respond well under mist.


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I can't offer any advice on the mister, but I sure do send ((( BIG HUGS))) your way.

    Bookmark   February 2, 2013 at 10:26PM
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Moonie, I can understand your situation because my dad also has vascular dementia / alzheimers. It is very difficult to deal with, or at least to me it as. At times I don't want to deal with it anymore, I just want to run away forever. At times I get so frustrated that I want to pull my hair out or punch something plus sometimes I get depressed about it. Unfortunately he can't taken any medication for it due to that he was diagnosed later and the doctor said he wouldn't benefit from it, which he didn't. There isn't many things he can do anymore, all he does is just sit there and stair at you, the floor, wall, or out the window. He isn't even allowed outside anymore because he wanders off. He won't fix him anything to eat, won't bathe himself, doesn't dress himself properly, doesn't do his laundry, & most of the time he has to wear adult diapers. Most of the time he can't remember his siblings names, sometimes thinks my sister & I's school pictures are pictures of his sisters, and he still thinks his mother is still alive although she has been gone almost 25 years. He also has been hospitalized 3 times in 2012, which he hated (kept asking to go home and sometimes would become hateful / snappy when he couldn't) -- pulled off his heart monitor and threw it in the trash, and he kept pulling out his IV's that he ended up bruising his arm. The nurses eventually had to put a monitor on the bed or chair to alarm them when he would try to get up to wander and they ended up having to have a nurse stay in his room 24/7 to watch him.

As I said, its very difficult to deal with someone with this illness. I wish the best for your family. ;)

    Bookmark   February 2, 2013 at 11:24PM
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Thank you, kim.

Sorry I was so long getting back. I can see that you and your dad have had it rough. My greatest hope is that God will bless our parents with some peace in their hearts.

My apologies to everyone else for bringing such a heart-wrenching OT subject to the forum. It was just an emotional day.

    Bookmark   February 7, 2013 at 11:54PM
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Loveplants2 8b Virginia Beach, Virginia

Hi Mona,

I'm sitting here in the waiting room as my 81 year old mother is going into surgery. There isn't any reason to apologize for your heart warming story. We all have things happening in our lives and sometimes it makes us feel better to share what we are going thru, I have some wonderful friends from the forums and I don't know what I would do without them!

So sorry to hear of the issues that are facing you and your family, take it one day at a time and it will all work out. One friend even mentioned to me that I will be back working with Plumies blooming and this will all be behind me... ;-) That made me feel so much better. It may take longer with what is going on with your mom, but knowing she has you as a daughter who is watching out for her best interest is such a gift in itself. You are a wonderful daughter and I can tell you love your mom very much. Just being there and close to her is the best medicine sometimes. Please know we are thinking of you and your family..



Kim.. I'm so sorry you have had to go through this... Many hugs to you as well! I hope things are better for you and your family... Much love to you!

Mona. I have misted the seeds before and they did fine. I still like the idea of watering them when I sow them in the summer, but misting will work too!

Hugs to you all


    Bookmark   February 8, 2013 at 9:22AM
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Laura - you are such an endearing person and always know just the right things to say to lighten the burdens of the heart. I know you are used to hearing it but you should stop and truly consider the things people say to you. You ARE a special person!

I have kept your mom in my prayers and hope she is doing well. Talk about a gift... you are that, as well, to your mother and to the many people that you encounter. All who reads this knows that to be true! :)

For the next week or so I am out of work until I get my mom settled in an AL facility. When I'm back to work I am going to start some seed under mist. Right now I have it set to only go off enough to keep tender cuttings moist but not wet. This is working well for Christmas cactus cuttings and may do well to get the plumeria seeds going. We shall see!

    Bookmark   February 9, 2013 at 7:06PM
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No-Clue(So Cal Zone 9)


That is so sad! It's not easy to watch your mom goes through that while you watch helplessly. I am sure you will miss spending time out the garden with her. :(

I am praying for you and Mother. Hugs.

    Bookmark   February 9, 2013 at 10:26PM
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Lynn - the past 10 days have been sheer hell for her but she's one of the spunkiest people anyone could ever meet.

Your prayers are greatly appreciated.

(((Kim, Laura, and Lynn)))

    Bookmark   February 9, 2013 at 11:23PM
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No-Clue(So Cal Zone 9)

Mona the bond between you and mother is beautiful and so moving. I am not close to my own mother but I sworn when I have kids that I would be the kind of mother that I had so often dreamt of. I now have such bond with my two girls, praise God.

Takes comfort in the fact that she knows you love her. Give her a squeeze from me too.

    Bookmark   February 10, 2013 at 1:26AM
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Mona, I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through! You are surely a wonderful daughter and even with her condition it's a blessing to be so near to watch over her.

Kim, the same goes for you. It really is so much harder on the family than the patient sometimes!

I wish the best for both of you--and your mom, Laura--and hope things get a little easier every day. You guys are like family and we all feel for each other's troubles.

Growing seeds are excellent therapy. Good luck with them!

    Bookmark   February 10, 2013 at 9:28AM
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Mona & Kim,

I am so sorry to hear what you are going thru with your moms. I remember going thru similiar times with my mom and yes, it is heartwrenching to know this is your mother that you love dearly but can't stop the progression of time. My mom is gone now but will always be remembered and loved. And while my mom knew us to a degree. I believe she recognized our voices more than anything. It was still sad when we had to tell her who we were when we went to visit her. My mom loved to garden and she loved flowers so I take comfort in my plants that I got my love for them from my mom.

So just take comfort that yes this may not be the same mom you loved as a child, be assured that in her heart she still loves you as much now as she did then.


    Bookmark   February 19, 2013 at 2:33PM
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Loveplants2 8b Virginia Beach, Virginia

You all are wonderful...

What would we do without our moms and dads?

Enjoy the time we have with them and let them know , they are loved...

To the ones that are no longer with us, let them live thru our lives as we touch our friends and children..

"circle of life..."

thank you Mona... That was so kind of you to say such sweet things..

Just know we are thinking of you...



    Bookmark   February 21, 2013 at 3:43PM
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