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newbettaowner

Male and Female Betta Together?

newbettaowner
18 years ago

I am a college student and I love fish. Since I had to leave my 10 gallon tank behind at home (due to lack of room)I just had to get a small little buddy for myself. I got a male betta, very beautiful and with apperently no anger issues like other bettas. Some of my friends have bettas, and while visiting them it seems that their betta's are very aggresive when you touch the glass. I tried this experiment with my betta and he just backed away without getting deffensive. My question is, I feel bad that he has no one to be friends with (I know it sounds cheesey). Would I be able to upgrade my bowl to a one or two gallon desk top tank and possibly add a female to the mix? I would like Oscar (that's his name) to be happy with the presence of another fish. Is this at all possible? Are there such things as peaceful male bettas?

Comments (123)

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    I have read everything available on Bettas and I am sure not the first aquarium with peaceful Betts, there are MANY examples posted and even some on You Tube! News flash, Bettas have been proven by many fish lovers to live peacefully in community tanks. One aquarium store owner himself remarked that in another store he saw a tank FULL OF MALE BETTAS and he marveled at how they were just swimming among each other peacefully.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    All that you have proved is that 28 Bettas can live in harmony, so far, in your tank. Just because your tank is working right now doesn't mean the whole world can do the same. II've said countless times that It's working for you. What works for one person doesn't always work for another. And you've only had this tank a year, but not with that many Bettas in it. You haven't proved anything yet. In another year or two with 28 Bettas, if their still live and we'll good job they can live in your tank.

    Emphasis on your.

    Most Bettas can be peaceful in a community tank that involves 1 male betta or multiple female Bettas with other fish such as tetras or cories.

    Im arguing a proven point? Ha That's funny. You havent proved anything yet. I can stick a goldfish in with piranhas and just because they don't eat it right away doesn't mean they'll live in harmony.

    Research takes many years and constant monitoring. It doesn't take 1 year of adding male Bettas every month. Your tank at the beginning didn't have 28 bettas. It does now however.

    So years and years of research and thousands of articles and even the Name Siamese fighting fish are all suddenly proven wrong because you have 28 male Bettas in a tank. Please.

    Why don't I try it myself? Cause I don't want to take that risk.

    Why endanger the lives of my Bettas? Everytime you put them together theirs always that risk that something might go wrong.

    Nothing can go wrong if you eliminate that risk.

    I don't need to prove my argument by trial as it's already been proven on countless sources from the Internet to books to movies.

    But keep living your fairy tail just don't start shouting you cured diabetes.

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    Put my male Bettas on You Tube called "Male Bettas Living togetherness" along with dozens of other's videos of their Bettas living together.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    Couldn't find the video, but it would be neat to see.

    Most of the videos put online only show a moment of them living together. It doesn't tell you how long they have been living together or anything. They could have put them together that day and took the video but a couple weeks or months down the road it might have not worked out


  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    It is up now on YouTube under Male Bettas living together. I have had mine for a year. Except the two I added last week. Whenever I add new ones they all just swim on in peace. New ones act surprised with the space!

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    I hope your setup works in the long run and you don't have any difficulties with the Bettas. Good luck

    And yeah it's always funny introducing Bettas to an aquarium! They act like they don't know what to do

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    My Bettas

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago



  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    Nice tank!

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    Thanks! There are dozens more on YouTube who have multiple Bettas in their tanks.

  • amauryruiz44
    8 years ago

    Is it true that if you put a bunch of females with only one male that the females will dominate the male? I saw it on YouTube and i dont know if its true. Because you know not everything on youtube is true.

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    There are no set parameters.

  • amauryruiz44
    8 years ago

    Ok thank you

  • amauryruiz44
    8 years ago

    Will this be ok or should i put more stuff?

  • amauryruiz44
    8 years ago


    I was wondering if i should put more things for her to hide in so the male and female be together.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    Females will dominate the male by attacking him.

    Female and male Bettas don't mix.

    The females have shorter fins which put them at an advantage towards the male. They can swim faster.

    Females can be just as aggresive as males. And male betta fish can be babies.

    Like I said before, the only time male and female Bettas should be together is if you wish to breed them. And even then they're only together for a short amount of time.

  • redvs
    8 years ago

    I didn't experienced that when I tried to merge 4females and my boy. At first they where fine , at least I thought they were. My male dominated all of them, including the ghost shrimp and snails. Except for one snail, that's his bestie. They were all just unhappy.

  • redvs
    8 years ago

    Phyllis is a experienced fish handler. So she knows what she is doing as well. I wouldn't recommend putting any bettad together untill you have a clear understanding of your betta's mood, behavior, eating, aggresion leavel ect... Just because they don't fight when your around doesn't mean they don't fight. My male betta even with a 20gal and tons of hiding place. He continued to charge, chase them away from food and pull pieces of fin off.They were all unhappy. I honestly believe my betta will not fare well with other bettas male or female!! Go Phyllis you should right a book.

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    There is a guy on You Tube with a huge African Cichlid tank and his answer to why they are not aggressive when African Cichlids usually are is to have a lot of them in your tank. IT IS THE SAME WITH MY BETTAS! Trust me, my tank is right across from my bed and I have been recovering for 2 years from a serious illness and I have watched my tank for hour every day. THERE HAS NEVER BEEN A SLIGHTEST HINT OF AGGRESSION! They swim past each other and never even look at each other in passing. I don't know how many more times to say it! Get over the bad hype, people and fill your tank with these beauties! You people sit there and stare at your fish expecting something, just enjoy them!


  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    You should all just grow up and go get some goldfish!

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    Here is. What I know about Bettas! The more the merrier! They are the most passive and peaceful fish you can find!

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    He's talking about male and female together. Which I bet you have no experience with at all.

    My friend put in females with his male and the male was dead with it in the week. It can easily be the same for one of the females.

    I've tried my best to make sense to you and everyone else but it's obviously not working.

    I've had both male and female Bettas for many years as well as numerous other fish species. I also specialize in aquatic plants and have an outdoor pond which is home to goldfish. I don't think I need to be doing any growing up on the fish front here.

  • phyllispm
    8 years ago

    Put 15 males with 15 females and you will have peace, or 10 of each.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    No you won't.

  • tw1stedmist3r
    8 years ago

    MrBlubs, I'll go ahead and say what I believe you're too polite to say. I think phyllis here is a bit mentally challenged. I'm not saying this to be rude but I think people need to know you shouldn't even put a male and a female together unless mating, let alone over 20 males. I've had these fish my entire life. I've tried almost every combination of males/females in different numbers/ alone and everyone reading this,

    Please know that betta fish are meant to be kept alone. It's how they are in their natural habitat. Also Phyllis, fish can not do tricks to relieve pain.. I mean come on. The number of fish you have in your tank changed two or three times in this thread. I thought you've been sick for a year or more starring at the tank. Wouldn't you know how many fish are in it? I'm not saying you haven't had luck in your situation, but if indeed your community is as peaceful as you think, than you have an isolated incident. Not many people could get away with it, please don't encourage ignorance. Bettas have always been fish that do better alone, It's a fact. FACT. Only you and a small percentage of people think this is okay. Because it's really not.

  • tw1stedmist3r
    8 years ago

    P.S. . The only way I can see that many bettas living together in peace is because they have plenty of space, and even then they're probably more stressed out than you think and future problems are likely. In nature you would never see that many bettas together. It's unnatural. But, It's cool that right now you're having good luck. However. To tell someone to grow up and acting nasty because they are stating facts that you don't like is kind of disgusting to read, even if you magically had 100 happy bettas in a 2 gal tank.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    Haha,

    Thanks tw1stedmist3r!

    At least some people actually can make real sense and have general knowledge!

    I wouldn't just randomly be saying this stuff and wasting my time typing paragraphs for fun to mess with people.

    If Bettas could be kept together I'd be jumping with joy and encouraging it but they just can't and shouldn't.

    Oh well.... What can you do?

    Thanks for backing me up ;)

  • asleep_in_the_garden
    8 years ago

    Many moons ago,I had this kiddie-pool thing set up in a place where I was staying. It was all full of aquatic plants that provided shelter for the female to hide in/behind. The male would chase her around ,but she could lose him really easily. He built massive bubble nests and I was pretty sure that this set up was going to work,but then hurricane katrina hit and my residence was totaled...and that was the end of that. Maybe one day I will make another attempt,but for now,my living conditions won't allow for it.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    That must of been really neat.

    To bad about the hurricane though...

  • asleep_in_the_garden
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    Bright side is that I know that it works. Before they lived in the pool,they were in a ten gallon out back behind the shop that was half full of water and so choked with plants that it was a wonder they didn't drown themselves in them. They went for weeks without any supervision of any kind,knowing that mosquitoes would be a constant food source. A storm came in one night and I knew that the tank would flood enough for the fish to go overboard so I took the tank inside. Once inside I became fascinated with the insect life that was so seemingly abundant...wait a minute...those aren't bugs! Then I noticed larger fry and realized that there had been multiple broods. When I took the tank home, I set up the kiddie pool and let the adults go in there. meanwhile I watched as the youngsters once big enough to start showing some color,proceed to pummel each other intent on killing one another in the same way that adults do. They're territorial critters from an early age,but in nature,..a rice paddy..there is all the room in the world to get away from one another and plenty of cover too. Compared with that,even the kiddie pool was pushing it. But one day I imagine I'll set it all up again. The more space these fish have to play in,the happier they are.

  • samo711727
    8 years ago

    I stumbled upon this thread and was horrified when I heard talk of 28 male bettas being kept together. What are you thinking? Obviously you're not, or you're high. I even watched the video of the "happy community males" and checked out the pictures. What I saw was a lot of torn and nipped fins.... And I highly doubt they're all crown tails so save that excuse. A couple of them also seemed to stressed to move from the bottom of the tank. As aggressive fish you will have some bettas be more dominant than others but don't be so foolish as to think they're living peaceful happy lives. I can't imagine the sress those fish are under. There's definitely not enough hiding spots and just because there hasn't been any fatalities yet. That they're happy or healthy or that there won't be in the future. Shame on you for encouraging people to keep a bunch of males together. You obviously don't have the best interest of the fish in mind and are "flipping them out of the frying pan and into the pot" when you're "rescuing" them from Walmart. I agree that it's sad, the fish are miserable, and they shouldn't be kept in deli cups. Mrblubs is right though. The best thing you can do to help those fish is to not support the sale of them. talk to store managers, hand out information, stage a protest if you really want to help them but don't just through them all together in a tank and pretend everyone wins.

    I thought I "rescued" 2 male half moon bettas from cups. Being ignorant and unprepared I bought an aqueon 2.5 gallon with divider. I wish I knew then what I know now. Way to small for 2 fish for starters and my one male was so aggressive he jumped the divider to get to the other one. No, he didn't "kill him" but he beat the living daylights out of him and he died 2 days later after I moved him to his own tank. I still feel awful about it and have since ditched the aqueon all together for a 5 gallon.

    Anyone who reads this, please don't risk putting any number of male bettas together. They're not lonely, they don't need a friend and you're just going to stress your fish out. People tend to imprint their own feelings and emotions onto their pets. Even if you house them together and they "seem fine" odds are they're not. They'll be happiest on their own in a heated 5 gallon with low current filtration and a moderate amount of live plants if you can.

    I found this forum in my search for opinions on starting up a female sorority tank. I have since decided not to even try and if anything I'll set up another 5 gallon to house another solitary Betta.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    She hasn't been active since her last post on here, so maybe she's just silently watching or has moved on.

    I just hope that people don't ignore 'us' and only listen to her advice. I know in the past all I would look for is one yes and ignore all the No's if I wanted something. Not for anything major though, just for small stupid things....

  • samo711727
    8 years ago

    If you ask me, I'd bet the silence is due to trouble in paradise. I also hope people don't heed that lemon of advice. It'll only end in heartache for all. I always search for what I want to hear too. Which like you said, is why it's so important to take collected opinions from different sources to come to well rounded conclusions. In this case; don't keep males bettas together, or male and females (unless for a short breeding period) and don't have high hopes for a peaceful group of gals although it is possible.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago

    Amen!

  • Christopher Brooke
    8 years ago

    Here is my 2 cents. I'm very experienced in bettas and their fighting tendencies. I will even lit them together to raise hormones or whatever it does, their fins grow back in a couple days and theyre transformed into more robust beautiful fish. Here is a before and after of a fish I conditioned. This is after only one week

  • Christopher Brooke
    8 years ago

    Also. I am not going to shoot down the lady saying she keeps a huge community. I can see it in them when the fight "clicks" its almost robotic. Like someone else mentioned they're so domesticated the really far out ones won't even fight if you try. If this lady is saying she's doing it right now, who are we to say she's crazy or out of her mind. SHE'S DOING IT. Now I want to try!

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    This is the exact response I was hoping that her comments wouldn't trigger, but honestly I've been waiting for it.

    To say

    'their fins grow back in a couple a couple of days and they're transformed into a more robust beautiful fish'

    Is a very cruel statement. Your basically saying it ok cause they'll 'grow back'. How about you go cut off the tail of a skink, cause it's fine it will grow back. That's honestly unacceptable.

    Getting their fins torn may not have an effect on you or have one noticeable on the Betta doesn't mean there isn't one.

    When they're fins are torn they become susceptible to disease. They'reat a weakened state and it puts high levels of stress on the fish.

    I see people reading your first comment as a means of you saying to them that allowing another betta to attack it makes their fins grow back better and will have more color. That's honestly one of the most ridiculous statements I've read so far in this topic. Promoting animal abuse.

    You can't say that all Bettas are now domesticated cause they've been bred so much.

    That's completly false. I honestly don't know why I and others have to continue to repeat ourselves.

    The thing is that you have to understand is anyone can do what she's doing. Anyone can go to Petsmart buy 50 Bettas and let them loose into whatever.

    Though it's not the right thing.

    Who knows what actually goes on in her tank? The torn fins and passive behaviour we gathered was only from a few short minutes of video.

    Just because one person 'says' they can do something doesn't mean that everyone else can.

    I fell 40 feet but I'm still alive. That must mean that I'm invincible and now everyone can fall 40 feet! Woo hoo!

    Come on people. Common sense.

    I'm getting really fed up with comments like these. And I honestly think this Aquarium forum or at least this topic should be deleted. It's too full of misinformation and is basically a graveyard.

    It's only providing false information and all in all supporting animal abuse.

  • Paula White
    8 years ago

    On the beta subject, I once had a pair of betas that did awesome together in one tank for a good six months. Until my teenagers decided yo eat them one night while I slept. No joke. But many years larer\ now I recently aquired a beautiful male beta, healthy for last three months. I went to pet shop asked questions on the differences on females and beta types and was assured male and female would be great in same tank. That was december 24 when I bought my male a female. Last night I came in from work turned tank light on and they were both doing good, so I thought. Went in other room to eat 30 minutes later went to bathroom looked over at tank and the beautiful male was in shreds no longer livable. Becareful, sometimes it might work, but most likely can prove to be brutal and fatal. Was told that she would only kill him after eggs were laid and to take him out. Well, did see any eggs laid giving a sign to seperate, two is the female you take out not the male. I will be educating the pet store employee believe me.

  • Paula White
    8 years ago

    Did not see eggs that is

  • Michael Holthe
    8 years ago

    I would say everyone here is right and wrong.

    First of all I have kept my betas (3 crown tail male) in a 75 gallon community tank with my 12 inch Pleco (he is 7 years old) along with four Angels (1 golden, and 3 common male Angels), 2 gouramis (1 opaline, 1 gold) 3 guppies (2 female, 1 male their fry become the other dishes food) and finally my baby black ghost knife fish which is only 5 months old for 3 years (excluding the bgkf of course) all of them have established "territories" in my tank which might I add only has one plant, but a cave and a log (for my Pleco an bgkf)

    now I wouldn't say im an expert but rather a scholar who has done nothing but study the behaviours and different needs and characteristics of each of my fish. If you plan on doing what any of the - insert vulgar name - above have said about keeping betas and (of any type male, female, crown tail, half moon, etc) always check for compatibility by putting the different betas together and watching them with a camera and your own eyes. If they show an intense interest in one another THEY ARE NOT COMPATIBLE, but if they show no interest (odds are your betas are blind) then you have a match.

    now as for me and my fish, I have had no problems with any of them attacking eachother except my guppies being eaten by all the other fish (minus the Pleco) I have 2 heaters set up on my tank and 2 filters but I only have one turned on at a time. I keep two at the ready in case one stops working (no shock for those of us who have owned large tanks with lots of fish) also I wouldn't recommend anyone who hasn't studied fish behaviour or doesn't understand (marine) ecosystems and how they work to set up a tank like mine.


    Now if you skipped all of that and just want the condensed version here it is: If anyone decides to try and attempt to put betas together always: 1. Check for compatibility by putting betas in separate glass jars where they can clearly see eachother and watch (I recommend setting up a camera for when you're not there) their behaviours for at least 2 days and if they show an interest in the other beta do not put them together. 2. If you do put them together and it seems fine always keep a spare tank handy in case you notice one picking on the other. 3. Always do your research on what a beta likes for food, ph level, and water temperature.

    Happy swimming my fishy friends.

  • Michael Holthe
    8 years ago

    Ps. Don't put betas together in a tank that's smaller than 75 gallons they need space.

  • jewelprincess1225
    8 years ago

    I've heard you shouldn't put two betta fish together, but I've seen a male and female together. Sorry I'm not much help, but That's all I know.

  • Alyssa Aiello
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    I had two females and a male together and they did fine. Sometimes they got into spats and would chase each other and just go and hide. That's the thing, I had plenty of space and places for them to go hide away when they wanted to. It wasn't too bad though.

  • samo711727
    8 years ago

    Holy cow people. It's not quantum physics, nor is it secret controversial knowledge..... Don't house bettas together! It's an accepted fact that they are aggressive with their own species. So why would you want to try to keep them together? What point does that serve? I don't doubt there are instances where people have "successfully" housed male/male & male/female bettas together. It is a widely accepted consensus that It generally never works! There's a case of a lioness caring for a baby gazelle, does that mean you'd let your pet in a lion enclosure? Since, hey, they could really hit it off......

    In the wild, bettas have acres of rice paddies to hide and stay away from each other. In any size aquarium they are limited by their enclosed space with no escape.

    Trying to house bettas together serves no benefit to the fish. Attempting it shows you have no interest in the fishes happiness or well being.

    Experienced betta breeders will tell you, the only time males and females are kept together is for a very short period for breeding only. Then separated. It's very common for one or both to be injured during the process.

    You can keep a group of females together (usually odd numbers work best) but good luck. More times than not you'll have to deal with fighting since the females can be just as aggressive as the males.

  • cinnabunbun
    8 years ago

    phyllispm sounds like a b word. "you should all grow up and get some goldfish" seems like you are condescending users by implying that they do not know how to take care of bettas. also.. this community needs to take a break on this topic. just because you have the equipment... doesn't mean you have the knowledge in breeding. just own the pets and be happy with your set up. stop trying to become entrepreneurial clowns in trying to breed and i'm guessing.. to sell them i'm assuming..

    don't try to make some comment and address me.. this was the most hilarious forum topic wall i have EVER stumbled upon today. but not even reddit worthy. do eff it. bye suckas

  • cinnabunbun
    8 years ago

    phyllispm

    Here is. What I know about Bettas! The more the merrier! They are the most passive and peaceful fish you can find!


    after every user in this topic says that bettas are aggressive. it's common knowledge they are aggressive. some more passive than others. but your credibility in this topic has just hit the fan after you said that.

    i'm never coming back to this topic ever again. good luck with trying to say something back to me. not gona happen.

  • MrBlubs
    8 years ago
    last modified: 8 years ago

    Can this topic be deleted some how?

    Or more importantly the whole Aquarium forum?

    It's rather pathetic to watch.

    Cinnabunbun, seems like a rather waste of your time to join a forum to post two arrogant posts. Seems like it would take a lot of your 'valuable' time away from your redditing.

  • Jesse .k
    7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Just got these a few days ago. Put them in this tank today. My first setup in 10 years

  • Peter Bunn
    7 years ago

    i have a 400 litre tank with silver sharks tetras pristellas, swordtails a 14" plecostamus, platys, danios, along with 5 female bettas and one male, and never had a problem from day one it has become a great community tank. no fights no attacking of other fish, nothing at all from day one

  • Anna Joslyn
    7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    I think it's insane people on here are housing male bettas together. They may not fight immediately but they will eventually. I have a 10g with 1 male, 3 corys, 2 cherry shrimp and 2 nitrite snails. The betta leaves everyone alone and yes males can be housed with OTHER types of fish but not other bettas. Females on the other hand can be housed together if the conditions are right and they have enough space to claim territory. I also have a 75g with 3 female bettas, a blood parrot, 3 gouromis, 1 pleco and a red eared slider. The females are happy and have never fought. I have never seen ripped fins but the trick is to add them all at once. You can't put them in one at a time. I've had the sorority of females now for 3 yrs with everything else. I would never recommend putting a turtle with your fish either like I did. My turtle is a weirdo and doesn't like the taste of fish and that's the only reason I did it. I used to have him in a 40g and would put feeder fish in and he wouldnt touch then. Once the feeders got to big I would take them back. I tried this numerous times for 2 yrs and never once did he show interest in making them a meal but like I said this is extremely unusual.

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