buy a pair of good pruning shears.. and go to town ... i find a little adult lubrication helps the whimsy factor ...

and when you screw it up .... beyond your tolerance.. tell hubby to sharpen the shovel and get it out of your misery ..

seriously.. what do you want us to say??? ...

properly sited.. its a gorgeous specimen ...

but.. its NOT properly sited.. whomever planted it.. didnt understand.. those cute little trees grow forever ...

its wide at the step.. get in there.. and remove some of the lowest branches... until its thin enough in the space.. and then decide if you like whats left.. think of it as some mid sized bonsai ...

not many peeps have 10 to 15 year old conifers to cut on ... go for it...

ken

ps: those things are sharp needled ... long sleeves... preferably leather ... and leather gloves.. and it will still prick you ... try taping your sleeves to the gloves ...

Nice specimen that is probably pretty old, as far as it goes. The main problem is that you don't like it - there is nothing to be gained by cutting part of it away, which will be the start of a downhill trip - as already indicated.

The point - so to speak - of this highly popular selection is its dense and nearly perfect symmetry.

Not particularly to my taste either, but somebody that likes this plant would be appalled if you cut at or cut down one of this size - maybe there is somebody you can pass it along to, who will come and dig it up at the right time of the year.

If that is possible, where it is situated.

Thanks to you both. I suppose I will attempt to remove the lowest branches and see how it feels. I'm not sure if it's dig-up-able but I guess I can try and post an ad here or on craigslist if I still hate it, and see if anyone wants a shot at it. I'm about 20 minutes ouside of Baltimore, MD and I don't know what exactly is "the right time of the year" for digging it up..

DO NOT limb it up as this will degrade its appearance considerably - there is no place on it where cutting part away will be an enhancement.

Once you start cutting it will reveal a web of internal dead branches that will be impractical to try and clean out. Just peek inside behind the green and you will see what I mean. This is just one reason why bboy says no cutting will be an enhancement.

tj

AL! You found me!!! I'm so happy. Thanks very much for responding. Yes, I can absolutely be patient and 3 or 4 years will be more than fine with me if I have an end result even half as cool as your blue spruce.

To the rest of you, I absolutely appreciate your input also. Being a beginner at all this,I am fully aware that I might not be able to achieve the results I want, just because another who happens to have a world of experience, did. But I'm willing to take the chance for several reasons.
1) the tree, while admired maybe by many, is expendable to me. If it doesn't work out, I can just remove it.
2) I have all the time in the world. We plan to raise the kids in this house.
3) most importantly-- Al's globe blue spruce is actually what led me to gardenweb in the first place! I joined last year bc of some plumbing issues but never even checked out any of the garden areas. Then a few weeks ago I was googling all kinds of conifer stuff and came across what I thought was the coolest little mini-tree ever, in one of the coolest gardens ever, and I tried emailing the dude who posted it all... and he actually emailed me back. Pretty exciting if you're me, which I am. Hehe.

So if Al says I could give it a shot, then by golly I am going to give it a shot. I've got nothing to lose really except some time. But at worst I'm sure I'll learn a thing or two along the way-- like the best ways to not get needles in my arms, Ken : ) so even that couldn't be wasted.

Ok so now Al, can you recommend a method to start this process? I'm more than happy to get a book if you have one you can recommend-- I don't want to burden you any more than I have to. I know in your email you mentioned taking the top off your spruce-- is that something I should do too or is it too late for that? I know I said she's expendable but I'd obvioulsy like to do whatever in my power to avoid that.

Also on another note, isn't there a way that I can click on a members name and see all their posts? I can't seem to find a way to even see *my own* without going back into each forum and finding my post somewhere in the list. As I spend more time on here, that is going to get very difficult. And I'd really like to see more of what you've all written/posted, both for inspiration and to gather more info and even to just have fun looking at all the beautiful stuff. I'd love to see some of your hosta Ken, for example- I see it's your favorite forum. I love hostas but again, just a newbie.

Thank you everyone and Al especially, for making my day : )

a conifer that size.. would be near impossible to dig and give away ... IMHO ... not only for its age.. but the near impossible site to dig it out properly .... and i would give all but hired professionals, low odds of doing so successfully .... so go for the pruning .......

there is a search engine near the top right.. IF you can remember any title ... or you could search a member name... its not the best ... try it with your own name... you could also make a folder on your favorites.. and save your own posts ...

there is also some 'clippings' thingee.. that i never figured out, nor looked into ... to store posts you like ...

the hosta forum is incredibly active ... though i dont post many pix anymore ...

just remember on this plant... like many conifers .... if you take all the green off a branch.. that branch is basically dead ... there are not dormant buds.. like other trees ... so you cut back... to a Y, with a live bud ... and in doing this ... you can shape a tree ...

most of us will admit ... we dont really like the 'poodle' shaped conifers ... we are purists in that regard ... but i bet nearly every one of us.. has.. at one time or another.. 'practiced' on shaping things... sometimes successfully... other times not.. lol .. its how most of us learned .... and how most of us come to sacrificing ugly plants ...

in fact.. i am chief resident of the weirder the better club.. and if you succeed ... i will send you the initiation forms.. lol ...

but most of my pruning.. and the odd results.. were initiated by mother nature damaging a plant ... and the fact that with 5 acres.. i can let things be for years.. to see what happens... rather than those on smaller property.. where space is at a premium .... and some level of perfection is requisite ...

give it a go.. show us what you did .. keep us posted ... it will be an experiment .. and i am glad you are going into it.. with the proper attitude ... its disposable.. so play with it ...

ken

It is a beautiful old specimen. Usually the old ones look pretty bad.
You have to look at it everyday, so do what makes you happy.
But I wonder, if complimentary plantings would make it blend in, like an ornamental grass on the left side, something like Miscanthus 'Morning Light', followed by another solid conifer shape, but smaller, and more ferny, and lighter in color, perhaps something like Chamaecyparis obtusa 'Golden Fern' .

Right now, it is a big solid blob sitting by itself. Looks out of place.

BTW... its Picea glauca 'Conica' .. commonly known a DASruce ..

do not be horrified.. when you get inside.. its entirely brown and dead looking..

no conifer holds its needles forever.. and as the surface canopy grows and shades the interior... there is no light to sustain needles/leaves ...

any little stubs in there.. that end w/o a green tip.. are dead.. and can be cut back to a branch with live grown ... its up to you ... how retentive you want to get in cleaning it all out ... that is where a design evolves ...

once you open up the structure.. and allow sunlight inside... it will start growing..to fill those spots back in ...

and this is how you end up with those horrible poodle forms ... though that process starts when young.. rather than your going at it far into maturity ...

i wish i had this project.. just to see what i could do ... my similar specimens.. ought to be in fear.. lol

ken

Aaargh! I've spent the last day and a half dealing with a flooded basement and unfortunately haven't had time to get on here and talk plants. Bit of a mess on my end currently, and am absolutely exhausted now so time to hit the sack. I work only 2 days a week but they are Friday and Saturday so it might be another day or two before I get back here still BUT I've seen your messages and want to respond, in detail : )
Ken, I'm so glad to hear this project seems exciting to you- I will def post pics along the way once I start.

More soon! Wish me luck, the basement debacle is far from over...

with what you are doing.. there is no seasonal schedule ... do it when you have time...

ken

Ok I'm back from wet-basement-hell. Long way to go but the worst is over and I'm ready to look at some other things for a bit!

Ken, thanks for all the great tips. I have seen that inside brown/dead-ness on other conifers --oddly enough I think we had one of these in my first years at the last house, much smaller though, that started to die little by little all around and I seem to remember pushing branches out of the way mid-process and seeing nothing inside but death. Ha. So good warning, thanks!

I'm posting another few pics here quick to show better where this thing is currently residing. I want you all to see how
1) nothing else could really be planted around it, unless of course it didn't have branches all the way to the ground, and
2) it's already taking up way too much space

I've googled "dwarf alberta spruce bonsai" for general shaping ideas and I like almost everything there. Is it safe to assume that I could work on copying one of those shapes, even though mine will be on a much bigger scale? Didn't want to copy other peoples pictures without their permission to show, but the point I'm trying to make is that I'm pretty open to different options. Most of them seem to still have their pointy tops so I suppose leaving that would work out just fine for me. Unless that means it'll get even taller... which I guess it does, ha.

Ok here come some pics. Just so everyone knows: I am completely unhappy with the way most everything in and around my house looks today. We bought it for the bare bones-- it has a pool where the kids will want to hang out with their friends, and a garage where hubby will want to play : ) and a basement that we THOUGHT we'd love for storage and a family room but this recent flooding has tainted that part for us. Anyway, I'm not proud to post these pics-- and many of the others I will be posting around this site soon for other reasons-- but I will do it anyway so that I can get some proper insight from all of you and so that as I slowly make progress, you will be able to see how your insight has helped me along...

Ok so the spruce is planted with rocks and ugly old pavers all around it-- like Ken said, it's clear that someone planted it not realizing how big it would get-- right on the side of the steps leading down to the pool filter that I have to access daily. It's already close to being in the way of that path, plus there are green onion-ish weeds and some sort of vine like weed that grows beneath it-- not ivy I don't think but something that's been difficult for me to pull out with the spruce in the way. It was everywhere last year and I was able to get most of it but not what's under the spruce obviously.

For the record, I use straight vinegar in a pump sprayer to kill the weeds in the pavers but I need a forecast without rain for a few days and we haven't had that for a while!

I'm not a fan of the white plastic fence or the green shutters either. Some day.