I don't think you were rude, my bff has a beautiful garden and she is the one who inspired me to start/want to garden! We go to plant sales together and also split/share plants. I gave 2 other friends about 30 plants each last year and both of them moved this year and one doesn't even stay in touch! The other one went back and dug up all the plants, she was NOT leaving them behind..lol! And the funny thing is she bought the 5 acres right behind me!!! I told her that she can have even more now!!!(I'm gonna turn her into a plant addict too!heh heh! I hope you feel better about this soon.

I don't it was rude, just very "nervey" is that spelled right? LOL!

sorry, I don't mean my friend was rude... I don't think that at all. Do you think I was rude to say no to her since she is moving?

she's your best friend - so no it wasn't rude because best friends can be very honest to each other. If this was an acquaintance I would have said it was rather impolite for her to ask plants solely for that purpose.

If you ever get caught up in another such situation you might be able to politely decline by saying the plants would take many years before it becomes spactacular. that it would be best to get instant impact annuals to get the same results.

I don't think you were rude at all! If anything, it was rude of her to ask. Basically, she was asking you to subsidize her sale. Had she asked you to go with her to the nursery to help her choose the best plants to help with curb appeal, that would have acceptable and probably lots of fun. Don't give it another thought, except maybe to gift her with a plant when she is actually moving-to start her out at her new place!

I actually had a somewhat similar thing happen a few years ago. My retired uncle and his wife moved into a big house with an empty yard. Knowing I garden they asked if I wouldn't help them design something out while I [and other relatives] were visiting them over the spring. I had seen the yard in pics and was excited to plan things out. Well she mentioned several times at the dinner table that she wished they had taken a house in another area and kept going on about it. I got the feeling that it wouldn't be out of the question for them to up and move again. I was slightly upset that they would ask and have me put in all of this time if they were going to turn around and sell the place. Somehow nothing much got done during my stay (everyone doing lots of things, so it was easy to sort of forget about it, LOL).

Several years later they are in the same house, but have done the yard up as they like. I am not at all sorry for not helping to plan things out. You should not feel bad AT ALL either. I think you would feel much worse for much longer if you ended up giving your friend some plants and then she moved soon after. Plus (since the house she is in is so close) you would end up driving by and looking at the neglected plants (cuz' who is to say new owners would be at all interested?) and it would continue to bother you. I know it would me anyway, lol!

I wouldn't feel bad about it Jody ;-)
CMK

No, I don't think you were rude. I agree with Cyn.

K

You did fine, in my opinion. Giving plants to your friend who won't be there to enjoy them sounds similar to times when my mom gives away things I give her, which makes me mad (sometimes), and DH furious (always). And since it would be quite a bit of work to plant all those plants, you would need to feel really good about doing it or you might resent doing it afterwards.

Besides, who knows, the people who eventually buy her house might like the fact that they don't have to first get rid of the old landscaping before doing it their way.

ianna also has a very good point about the plants taking some time to look their best, too.