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rafed_gw

1 squirrel and my figs

rafed
14 years ago

Just got home from a three week long trip. Boy did I put in some miles.

First thing I did was hugged my wife and kids and told them how much I missed them and brought in my dirty clothes.

I have double slide glass doors that lead to my back yard and the first thing I noticed was THAT SQUIRREL!

It has put on some weight since I've been gone.

Of course, When the cat's away the rats will play.

Compared to your average squirrel this one is time and a half. And it's not scared, It will come right to you.

Figs are my passion, The squirrel has become an obsession!

I think it bit off a little more than it can chew, This means War!

I think the time has come for that rodent to learn a lesson.

No, I will not kill it.

But it will be moving soon, Some place far far FAR away.

I will take a picture of my problem and post it sometime in the near future.

Rafed

Comments (29)

  • anniebomm
    14 years ago

    Rafed,

    Your pet is happy that you are home!

    I went through my own relocation project with raccoons in my attic. The first one I trapped, I drove for miles into the country looking for the right spot to release him. (Some woods, a pond, no nearby neighborhoods.) The second one, I dumped kind of near a neighborhood where no one saw me do it. The third one, I pushed out the front door of my house, ran back up to the attic, then hammered some metal vent covers into place over the attic vents before he could beat me up there and let himself back in!

    Good luck!

    -Ann

  • xgrndpounder
    14 years ago

    If any wild animals ever make the mistake of acquiring a taste for my figs, It darn well better hope the is a Wild animal Heaven......That's not a threat, it is a promise!

    Cecil

  • bonsaist
    14 years ago

    Get your self a good trap such as Havahart. I already trapped a couple squirrels and a skunk. They are now history.
    We're allowed to kill them they don't want you to relocate them to someone else's area.

  • genecolin
    14 years ago

    Rafed, glad to hear you made it home safely. Some good news, some of your cuttings have started to leaf out, bad news no roots yet. If you really want to get rid of that pesky squirrel, just send him to me. It's been a long time since I've had squirrel smothered in onions.

    "gene"

  • rafed
    Original Author
    14 years ago

    Gene,

    I was thinking about getting in touch with you and ask you for some Cajun recipe.

    Or mix it in the boil with some,
    crawfish,
    crablegs,
    shrimp,
    corn,
    potatoes and cajun sausages with some ice cold beer.

    Rafed

  • oxankle
    14 years ago

    Boil him up with some salt and pepper, maybe a bay leaf. Then make dumplings.

  • peg919
    14 years ago

    UGH! How can you eat those bushy tailed rats!

  • giants_2007
    14 years ago

    With a fork

  • genecolin
    14 years ago

    Of all the wild game I've eaten, squirrel is the sweetest and best tasting in my book. You don't need much in the line of seasonings. A little oil in cast iron pot to brown him, a couple or three or four big onions to smother him in, a good amount of water to tenderize him, and let him cook long and slow until tender and almost all liquid is gone. Since he is fig fed and fat that will only make him taste better. Don't need no fork, just suck the meat off the bones.

    Anyway I hope you figure out a way to solve your problem of the thieving fig squirrel. At least you have all winter to think about it.

    From the bayou,
    "gene"

  • big_al_41
    14 years ago

    take some spray paint, Day Glo color and spray a spot on his back...that way you will know if he came back to you.

    Me I have had either relocated or dispatched well over 300 of those munchers in the past 4 years, I don't mind sharing it just PLEASE leave me some !!!!

    Big Al

  • fatnsassytexan
    14 years ago

    Hey Gene, re: Not much in the way of seasoning??? What kind of Cajun recipe is that?Hahahaha! Just joking. I'm with Peg, I'd rather not------ate some once when I was a kid. Guess I'm too much of a city boy. Tim

  • madelaine
    14 years ago

    I planted some Chestnut trees almost 20 years ago. Last year I had the first real harvest. This year the squirrels got almost every nut before I did. My husband told me i had to wait until the trees produced more than the squirrels could eat. We have squirrels in the fig trees too, but it's the starlings that really make a mess of the figs.

  • genecolin
    14 years ago

    Tim although I tout a cajun heritage, I'm more of a bayou cajun, rather than a prairie cajun. They are the one's that like the hot sauce. Our dishes are more subtle and more on flavor than hot. Of course a little hot is nice on some dishes. Take a fat squirrel that has fattened himself on figs and make a gumbo with him and oh la la, get the Tabasco or the Tony's.

    "gene"

  • rafed
    Original Author
    14 years ago

    Gene,

    I just saw that Fat Ba$tard in the back yard.
    Looking hopeless with all the trees in the garage.

    Like a crackhead walking around trying to find something to smoke.

    If you like hot food then I could send you some seeds of some small red hot peppers we grow here.
    They are so hot you can see the sparks coming out of them ( LOL ).

    I will first have to see what my father did with them.

    Rafed

  • genecolin
    14 years ago

    I grow many things but I'll pass on the peppers. Thanks anyway.

    "gene"

  • price403
    14 years ago

    Squirrel smothered in fig sauce?

  • rafed
    Original Author
    14 years ago

    The ba$tard was in my garage today trying to steal some cookies!
    Had the side door opened and when I went to the garage there he was like a thief trying to open a tupper ware container filled with home made cookies.

    When he saw me he freaked out and didn't know what to do,
    You should have seen it.

    First my figs and now my cookies. I guess that's his way of making fig cookies.

    I think now it's time for him to meet his maker.

    Rafed

  • fatnsassytexan
    14 years ago

    Hi Rafed, you'd better catch that sucker before he eats you out of house & home. Better yet, mix him up a batch of poison fig cookies! Haha! Tim

  • anniebomm
    14 years ago

    Rafed, I think this squirrel means business.

    If he's in your garage looking for cookies, I think you'd just better give him one!

    -Ann

  • xgrndpounder
    14 years ago

    Rafed,

    A well placed 22 short bullet will stop that thing.

    Cecil

  • socalliegal
    13 years ago

    LOL LOL LOL...you folks had me laughing about the Fat Ba$tard Squirrel. The squirrels in my area I think don't have a clue about eating from trees. They are spoiled on peanuts. I was going to suggest to Gene to pour out a bag of peanuts away from the fig-tree but this post is so old that Fat Ba$tard has either went to Animal Heaven or a nearby city by now (or a dinner recipe).

    :-)

  • noss
    13 years ago

    OK, Rafed, so what did become of your fat little bushy-tailed tree rat?

    I couldn't kill something with that cute a face and those bright, black eyes, but that's just me. However, I'm used to people eating wildlife. One day, a neighbor called and told me she was baking a 'possum (or was it a raccoon...) and would I like to try it. I passed on it, but it sure smelled good. (I had to go see it) Another neighbor told me she was baking a bullfrog her husband had gigged. It was stuffed and oven-braised. That must have been a BIG olf frog! I love it here!

    Gene, I'm like you, a bayou Cajun(not), I think. I go for the flavor with some heat, but I don' like to cauterize my tastebuds, no! :)

    I say I'm a Cajun(not) like y'all do with the fig trees that aren't. My boss's Cajun Uncle Ossie gave me a test, many years ago, and I passed it, so he said, "You're one of us," and I took that to heart and was so proud I had passed his test. He was the sweetest old fella and I loved it when he would stop by the clinic to visit. We've been here most of our lives now and don't want to leave.

    Love dem crawfish, yeah!

    Vivian

  • rafed
    Original Author
    13 years ago

    Vivian,

    I can't think of the name but they are plastic inserts that you put in the ground and contains food for the ants that later kills them. I had placed about a dozen or so of them on my potted fig trees and when I returned from my last trip they were all chewed up and the food/poison was gone.

    I can only pin it to my pet Fat Ba$tard Squirrel ( that's his name ).

    Hope he didn't pull a Suicide thing on me.
    Because I was getting ready to put a slug in him. Has over crossed his boundries this year one too many times.

    Oh well,
    At least I won't have to feel guilty now.

    Rafed

  • ottawan_z5a
    13 years ago

    noss, the squirrels don't have a pretty face when you look very close and more so with their mouth open and more and more so after they have taken away your strawberries, figs or apricots.

  • noss
    13 years ago

    Hi Ottawan,

    I beg to differ--They always have a cute face, no matter what they're doing--It's just that when they are doing their little sqirrely things, you just can't appreciate it as much. :) I certainly do understand your sentiment. No one can really like a destructive animal, which puts it into the pest category. I think if you're going to kill them, you should enjoy eating them, since they have fattened themselves upon the bounty of your garden.

    noss

  • socalliegal
    13 years ago

    Ha Ha Ha, well at least we know of the outcome. I am tending to think a squirrel had stolen the only nectarine on the baby tree I bought this year from Home Depot....grrr!

  • tmc2009
    13 years ago

    I've had it with squirrels too. Its not like they're in short supply or something. I tried the have a heart cages, but I don't have the time or energy to transport them. Plus its illegal to transport wildlife so you can get fined if caught. I have found that rat traps work but then I worry about catching other things at night which I don't have a grudge against, yet. I found these traps which will only catch the squirrels. Set it and forget it.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Squirrel traps

  • rafed
    Original Author
    13 years ago

    Since my last reply I have not been at home as much. But when I have been home I have not seen the squirrel.

    Maybe it went Ka-Put.

    But I will still sleep with one eye open. Not letting off guard!

    Rafed

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