That said, a few years ago I planted a row of the lavender-shouldered turnips in a friend's garden. Six or eight weeks later I returned to harvest some. I made my merry way down the row, picking baseball-sized turnips. Then I seized the top of one which I struggled to unearth, bracing myself against resistance I'd not encountered with its brethren. I finally got a spade and worked around this megaturnip. When I got it out of the ground, my eyes grew wide and I ran to the house to fetch my friend. Together we stood there and stared in shock at the largest turnip we'd ever seen. It was about the size of a volleyball and must have weighed 8 - 10 pounds. I warned my friend that it might be woody and/or bitter, but by all reports the flesh was crisp, succulent, and mild. It fed him and his wife for a week.

I don't know why this turnip mutated to grow the way it did. All the other turnips in that row - planted from the same packet of seeds - were normal in every way.

Anyway, I didn't realize until I'd uprooted it exactly what I was dealing with. My first reaction, which lasted only a few seconds, was a sort of vague fear and shock.