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Politically Correct

Posted by silversword 9A (My Page) on
Thu, Jul 25, 13 at 15:40

From Webster: Politically Correct is....conforming to a belief that language and practices which could offend political sensibilities (as in matters of sex or race) should be eliminated.

On the booty thread there was a comment regarding an insult, what should be taken as insult, if one person being offended was enough...

It made me think of how uptight some are about being PC, and how slack others are... I'm pretty happy medium. I try generally not to insult or hurt others so being PC isn't really on my radar but it seems things are different for other people.

Have we gone too far? Should we go further? How do we prevent hurting people without muzzling?


Follow-Up Postings:

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RE: Politically Correct

Great question!

We need to be aware of what might offend someone else but some people are too thin skinned and look for every opportunity to skew any comment so they can offended.

I think I'm like you - I do my best not to offend but it is pretty hard to offend me.


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RE: Politically Correct

I'm blonde and I say bring on the dumb blonde jokes because they are funny.

However, there are certain groups of people that I no longer talk about because, quite frankly, I don't know what the politically correct way to describe them or address them is nowadays. Or do people even want to be differentiated by being labelled as something other than no-adjective American or Canadian.

As far as sexual orientation - I just don't know anymore. My nephew says he doesn't want a label, he says all you have to know is that I prefer the company of gentlemen.

edited to add: trying to figure out if I have to edit this so as not to offend anyone.

This post was edited by blfenton on Thu, Jul 25, 13 at 17:01


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RE: Politically Correct

Obviously some articulations are so incredibly blatant. Steve King (R Iowa) points out quite clearly he's not a fan of either immigrants or immigration reform.

To wit: “For every one who’s a valedictorian, there’s another hundred out there that they weigh 130 pounds and they’ve got calves the size of cantaloupes because they’re hauling 75 pounds of marijuana across the desert."

At least these people are recipients of backlash, even from Boehner. But I think Alan Grayson (D Florida) said it best a while back when referring to the less accommodating side of the House as "callous bigoted tools."

It's just not on my radar either. But I can't help thinking for people to come out with such things that do hurt, those things have to be thought of/about and formulated in their minds.


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RE: Politically Correct

I think it is always best to err on the side of caution and there is nothing hard about watching our words.

Words are powerful so If one does unintentionally offend with words they chose to use then just apologize. Too often instead we see people defend, excuse or justify their remarks. Thin skinned is a matter of opinion and if someone perceives a remark as offensive then why not just apologize for offending them? Chances are if one person finds the comment offensive then so do others.


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RE: Politically Correct

  • Posted by brute Florida 9B (My Page) on
    Thu, Jul 25, 13 at 18:43

I'm always amazed at how large the "protected minority" list is growing.
We are now supposed to humor mentally ill people called "transgenders", or risk being considered politically incorrect.
Good God, what next?


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RE: Politically Correct

I guess you are referring to my post in the "booty" thread?

Epi states my position well above.

If someone says something and they are told it was offensive then it was offensive. Don't try to deny or deflect. They may not have meant to be ofensive but that doesnt mean they weren't. Apologize. And mean it by not using the offensive words again. Just seems like common courtesy to me. To claim it was not offensive just makes one look like a jerk IMO.


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Would 'jerk' be considered 'politically incorrect'?

'Brute', words and names actually speak volumes.


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RE: Politically Correct

Do you really believe the transgendered are mentally ill and that they need (or want) to be humored? The APA wants to help make clear that there is nothing pathological about having a transgender identity and could/should be regarded as another human variant.

Perhaps the current psychology of naming and categorizing annoys some people, but in this case, why even contemplate humoring and risk violating Title VII of the EEOC's discrimination laws... particularly if you should find yourself in the unlikely position of hiring anyone.

Guess you're one of those folks comfortable with calling 'em as you see 'em. How's it working for you going on the assumption you sometimes find yourself in polite company?


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RE: Politically Correct

A Scroll On By if ever I read one.


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RE: Politically Correct

I'd agree. But, then again, we haven't had a good shaming for a while.

Setting Minnesota nice aside and dipping a toe in the pond of the dark side, I thought this untoward...


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RE: Politically Correct

So, is there a difference in being careful not to offend someone by saying something you know will offend them and in going out of your way to say something to someone that you know will offend them?

Who is non-offense worthy and who is worthy of offense?

Lots of rules and proclamations promulgated from inconsistent sources lend confusion to what constitutes politically correct and all out, intentional offense.


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RE: Politically Correct

but some people are too thin skinned and look for every opportunity to skew any comment so they can offended.

Yeah them!


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Same observations and questions that I have, Demi. In my mind, the answer to the question in paragraph is a big yes. There must be malice for it to be a bad act. Otherwise it may be misguidance.

Or it may be a totally situational incident wherein the offendee seriously needs to lighten up. Sometimes over-reacting to an intentional slight can be very offensive.


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RE: Politically Correct

Posted by labrea 7NYC (My Page) on
Thu, Jul 25, 13 at 23:21

but some people are too thin skinned and look for every opportunity to skew any comment so they can offended.

Yeah them!

*

Repeated not so subtle very personal digs meant to offend do not translate to thin skinned.


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RE: Politically Correct

creating a hypothetical condition (thin skin) as defense against future events amounts to what... a defensive person? Or a colloquial condition that usually only exists in the mind of the unaffected party!

This post was edited by labrea on Thu, Jul 25, 13 at 23:52


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RE: Politically Correct

To me the most politically incorrect of politically incorrect is to label insensitive rude speech as Politically incorrect. The very essence of PC is rude, tatty and crass. If you have offended someone you have offended. When you decide how offended they have a right to be, what are you but a rude jerk? To apologize costs you absolutely nothing and amazingly it is the right thing to do-free and right all at the same time. Win, win. How hard is that? Those of you who are sure that offended people are just thin skinned are? How can I put this and still be PC......


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RE: Politically Correct

I remember when the phrase 'politically correct' or simply 'PC' was an in-joke on the left - a form of gentle self mockery.

When did the right co-opt the phrase and make it a pejorative? Obviously I wasn't paying attention when it happened.

edited to correct spelling.

This post was edited by nancy_in_venice_ca on Fri, Jul 26, 13 at 2:18


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RE: Politically Correct

"Those of you who are sure that offended people are just thin skinned are? How can I put this and still be PC......"

"You/they shouldn't be bothered whats the matter with you or them"
How dare you make me feel potentially uncomfortable or foolish about what I have just said.
Wait I have my trust defense "Your too sensitive, this is just about being PC"
Or my least favorite "Buck up" response "Buck off"


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RE: Politically Correct

Or my least favorite "Buck up" response "Buck off"

*

Now we're getting to brass tacks.


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To apologize costs you absolutely nothing and amazingly it is the right thing to do-free and right all at the same time. Win, win.

Yup, some might even call it 'personal responsibility'.


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RE: Politically Correct

The original intent of being PC was to replace words that inferred a certain gender or race with words that were grender neutral or the preferred word to describe ones race. For example, Chairperson rather than Chairman and Black vs Negro.

When it comes to sensitive matters such as race, gender, religion , physical appearance there is simply no need to be offensive to another person by the language we use.

I think the term PC diminishes the intent in a mocking way.


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RE: Politically Correct

...there is simply no need to be offensive to another person by the language we use.

But this is the problem - I'm not sure that some of the words I might be using are offensive or not. For eg Native Americans - are they Native Americans or First Nations or First Peoples. What do they wish to be called or do they simply wanted to be called Canadians or Americans. I don't know. I don;t want to offend this group of great people but I just don't know.

And in Canada there is the Indian Act of 1867 administered by the Minister of Aboriginal Affairs and Northern Development. So now what.

And the terms change by the generation. I need a PC dictionary.


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RE: Politically Correct

blfenton - you're not the type of person I am referring to in my posts. You clearly care about offending people with your words. Perhaps you may use a term that some find offensive, but I get the impression you would apologize and attempt not to use the word(s) again. My comments are about the people like the doctor in the booty thread and posters in that thread that state that since they don't find the words offensive, they don't understand why others would.

It certainly can be tricky keeping up with what is now considered PC or not. And it does change with each generation. We just have to try and pay attention if we care to not offend. Nobody is perfect. It's the caring and trying part that some are missing.


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"My comments are about the people like the doctor in the booty thread and posters in that thread that state that since they don't find the words offensive, they don't understand why others would. "

I agree Jill. if someone feels that they have been offended then they have been.....it may not have been intentional but it can be hurtful all the same. Of course if it is intentional then that's even worse.

blfenton, I agree keeping up with the current PC nomenclature can be tricky. I'm not sure exactly what I am since I turned 65...but any one calls me a senior citizen and they'll know right away that ain't PC!!!! LOL


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jillinnj - Ok, now I get your point. And not caring about people's feelings - that I do find offensive.

My life is too small and too short not to be inclusive of others different from me. And if part of being inclusive is using a term that others feel properly describes them with respect, both culturally and historically, then I'm good with that. Who am I to deny that?


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RE: Politically Correct

Agree as well Jill.

There are words or phrases or even beliefs that we know are not appopropriate yet some feel that because they dont think they are bad use it anyway. The bottom line is if something offends, then it is offensive and shouldn't be used again. It isn't a difficult concept. The world is bigger than just oneself so if it offends even 1 other person then it shouldn't be used.

I think the term PC diminishes the intent in a mocking way.

I agree with this as well. When someone says they are "tired of being PC" they are simply saying they are tired of not being able to be rude and inappropriate because it is all about "me" and if I'm not offended then no one else should be.

This post was edited by epiphyticlvr on Fri, Jul 26, 13 at 12:51


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RE: Politically Correct

I think it is always best to err on the side of caution and there is nothing hard about watching our words.

A number of us seem to agree on this, and I wonder if sensitivity is due to exposure to a wider variety of cultures, ethnic groups, religions, nationalities, etc.

Somewhat related to the topic: I primarily use 'Latino' while the national norm seems to be 'Hispanic.' I read that Hispanic is preferred through the U.S. except in California. So I'm also reflecting my environment with my choice of words.

As an aside there's a low-key debate in Southern California now -- to pronounce cities, streets, etc. with Spanish names with their anglicized versions, or original pronunciation. Interestingly, one several towns have always maintained the original pronunciation: Camarillo and La Jolla. Our local Ballona Creek receives no such respect.


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RE: Politically Correct

I so agree with the PC label being dismissive-that is what I find so offensive about it. All this sort of thing used to be covered under being polite-a social requirement. Nice people were supposed to be sensitive to those around them and yes it was hard. I was a clueless child and unless someone spelled it out to me I wasn't very good at guessing what was and was not appropriate-answer to that is keep your mouth shut-very easy.
Here is another easy one-if you don't know, respectfully ask, apologize for having to ask if necessary, after all it is free.
I say this as a socially clueless failed southern ding dong. I learned the hard way.


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RE: Politically Correct

chase - as far as I'm concerned you are middle-aged. I just turned 60, middle-aged to me, and that is how I define myself. My mother is 84 and heaven help anyone who calls her elderly.

Why is it that on the news, newspapers or tv, people are defined as 'a 21 year old man', a '55 year old women' BUT an *elderly* 77 year old.
No one else gets an adjective attached to their age. Ageism or maybe I'm just being sensitive as I enter that era.

But thinking about it - people are often defined on the news by their ethnicity except for white people. I wonder why that is and why does it matter? Why should it be pertinent to the story? Is it a form of profiling - for eg - if there is a gang-shooting in my province a specific ethnic group will generally be involved and the story will mention that group - almost as if to reinforce the characteristics associated with that ethnicity. And yet the ethnic group as a whole are great normal everyday people. Is it sensationalist reporting and does it matter. I don;t think it should.


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RE: Politically Correct

It's my opinion that common sense and common courtesy should be enough to tell us what constitutes an offensive word or set of words, though I do think that people these days take the "being offended" just a little too far.

Sometimes, I think it's not so much what we say, as it is how others interpret what we say.

Regarding the thread in question, a professional should know better than to use possibly offensive wording in the presence of a patient, but on the other hand, what level of wording was necessary to get the point across to that patient? And do we even know what races we were discussing, pertaining to the doctor and patient? I don't recall that aspect being discussed.

We know how most news agencies cherry pick or twist in order to gain and keep readership and ratings, so it's seldom we get the whole story or all of the details that matter.

I think too many people are way too easily offended within today's society. I don't know when we became this over sensitive society without a sense of security, self esteem, with such incredibly thin skins.

If someone tries to offend me, it makes me think they must have issues... otherwise, why would they purposely be insulting?

Common courtesy, and common sense... very useful.


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RE: Politically Correct

I wasn't meaning to call anyone out with this post, it just struck me...

I think that the kind thing to do, when told I've offended, is to apologize for any pain I may have caused. Even if I think I'm "right" and they're being "thin-skinned" I'd rather not cause pain than be right.

Seems easy to me. Sure feels better than holding onto my rightness. I may not agree with people and their choices but it's so great that we can make choices.

When you judge others it says more about you than it does about them...


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RE: Politically Correct

I think too many people are way too easily offended within today's society. I don't know when we became this over sensitive society without a sense of security, self esteem, with such incredibly thin skins.

Exactly the attitude I'm talking about. You do not get to decide what is offensive or insulting to someone else. You may think it's not insulting or they are too thin-skinned, but that's irrelevant.

And how someone being offended by something someone said means they don't have a sense of security or have no self esteem, is beyond me. I don't see how you make that leap.


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Was it necessary to quantify my post with "generally speaking"? I thought that's what we were doing... speaking in general terms. Did we read the entire post, and did we take context into consideration? Did we think about more than one way to offend or be offended?

The leaps I make are perfectly sensible to me... I can't really help it if it's a concept not understood by someone else... which speaks exactly to the idea that some others interpret things in entirely different terms than they're meant.

For example, how is it offensive to have a Christmas tree set up in a town square? Or how is it offensive that "in god we trust" is plastered all over our currency? Or, how is it offensive if a person chooses a mode of dress or decoration that some others don't approve of, or kisses their mate in public? Or, why would it offend someone if I don't care for their style, or for some wording they used... and why should I be offended?

I think that if people, in general, spent a little less time being all butt hurt every time another person opened their mouth or did something that maybe makes that person happy, there would be a whole lot more time to enjoy life, and a whole lot less offended people running around looking to take offense at the very next thing they don't like or can't handle... in general.

My opinion is... that our society has taken being offended to whole new levels... that I simply can't grasp.

What DOES it speak to when people get all offended over every little thing, all the time?


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Again, you don't get to decide what is offensive to someone else. A very simple concept.


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RE: Politically Correct

" you don't get to decide what is offensive to someone else".

You're offended by some innocent comment of mine?

Your problem, not mine.

"A very simple concept."

Hay


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RE: Politically Correct

"The world is bigger than just oneself so if it offends even 1 other person then it shouldn't be used."

Disagree. Some people simply cannot be pleased and are way too easily offended. Unless the offended party can ascertain with certainty (is that redundant?) that offense was intended, they may still feel offended, but I don't think the allegedly offensive party can or should be held responsible. It's a personal problem and the offended party needs to suck it up and move on. JMO.


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RE: Politically Correct

On the other hand:

If I thought for a second that my saying that some people's obnoxious posts on this forum bothered me would slow them down, I'd love it.

Not going to happen.

Hay


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Not for a second!


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RE: Politically Correct

Would it work on you Hay?


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"Would it work on you Hay?"

Moi? Sweet, innocent Hay?

"You're offended by some innocent comment of mine?

Your problem, not mine."

I'm fond of thinking and saying that, "No matter what you do, you're going to upset somebody. And, no matter what you do, you're going to upset everybody around you at some point." You can't win.

I'm actually quite amazed, as demonstrated in this forum to me, anyhow, that we can have such polar opposite views about who is the worst offenders in the offensive department. Blows me away sometimes.

I'll be sweeter. I promise.

Hay


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RE: Politically Correct

I think what confuses me the most is the idea that any general statement made is immediately taken in and digested as a personal affront.

We've been through this at least a time or two... unless your name is attached to a post, unless you are specifically tagged by name, the post is not about you, personally. It is a statement or opinion of general content.

This is precisely why I've taken to using the word "one"... because the word "you" seems to elicit all kinds of excitement, or anxiety and strange outbursts, and sends various defense mechanisms into full bore operation.

As I stated somewhere above... I'm not sure it's always about what one says, but in the way others grab it and interpret it.

Discomfort... something seen quite often within the public realm...


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RE: Politically Correct

I find the whole "intention" idea a bit strange. It goes something like this: if I use a word (for instance) that offends you but I did not consciously intend to offend you, I must be excused. In fact, I can then go on and use the offending word because I do not consciously intend to offend anyone by using the offensive word.

That's gobbledygook double-talk--but some posters engage in something kind of like it.

First of all, there is also "unconscious" motivation. You may not have consciously meant to offend me, but do you unconsciously harbor hostile feeling towards me and unconsciously ventilated them by using the term that would offend me? In other words, a passive aggressive mode of operation! And lack of introspection and self-knowledge!

Secondly, even if you honestly had no intention of offending me, once I tell you that word offends me, you have a choice. Since you are now conscious of the word offending me, you must also be aware that every time you repeat the offending word, you are offending me. But if you like or respect me--now that you are conscious of the offending word--you will not use the word if you want to communicate that you like or respect me. Which means that if you continue to use the offending word, you are communicating that you do NOT like or respect me. I hear you!

Thirdly, if it is common knowledge in society that certain words are often interpreted as offensive, then if you use those words, you will either sound like an out-of-touch dinosaur in modern society--as in, get with it, man! time to catch up a few centuries--or you will come off as someone who really doesn't care if lots of people out there are offended--in which case, don't be surprised if people are often getting ticked off with you.

But yes, I also agree with some posters here that there are some people who are so hyper-sensitive that they get offended at all sorts of things that few others do. I usually wouldn't deliberately try to offend them once I found out that X offends them so much, but I sometimes might ignore them if I couldn't come up with any valid justification for why they are feeling offended. But then I shouldn't be surprised if they don't particularly like/respect me as a result--since I obviously would be signaling that I don't particularly like or respect their feelings. Works both ways, as it turns out.

Kate


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Well said, Kate. Some will never get it. Or don't want to get it. Too bad.


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I'm no advocate of being cruel to others, but I can't imagine what it must be like to go through life being emotionally crippled by what other people say, especially when those other people are likely fools. Or, going through life being angry in general, constantly anticipating the next slight and seeing an insult where none exists.


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Oh, I see, If you offend me then I must be an emotional cripple, but that does make you the fool?


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Oh for pity sake. Has no one here read Emily Post?


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I think there are those who thrive on being offended and the preference is often to be offended on someone else's behalf.

It's a subset of doing things, not because one personally feels a need, but because it's a way to shovel it off under the pretext of it being for someone else's own good.


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RE: Politically Correct

It's this chirpy little TV anchor who when describing an incident involving a 62 year old woman called her elderly!!. Now that's not PC.


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"but any one calls me a senior citizen and they'll know right away that ain't PC!!!! LOL

You'll get used to it after you ask, "Do you have a senior discount?", enough times. Especially if you get back, "You, a senior? No way!" Nice to get carded at this age.

It just rolls off my tongue. At Burger King, "A small black coffee with my senior discount, please." 53 cents. I'll say just about anything to save 53 cents. They get most of the savings as a tip.

Sweet, innocent Hay


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RE: Politically Correct

Lily, I once considered 60 to be elderly, but that was a loooong time ago, when 60 was a number way off in the distant future! Now that I'm rounding third and heading for home, as it were, 60 seems relatively young.

I guess it's impossible to please all the people all the time... or something to that effect.

Since this is a public forum, specifically for the discussion of subject matter that might be construed as controversial, and forums generally include personal opinion as part of the accepted format, I normally approach responding in writing exactly as I would in speaking... as though everyone were sitting in a group, face to face, enjoying coffee or tea in lawn chairs on a patio somewhere. I never write anything that I wouldn't say out loud and in person.

I tend to be one of those "articulate people with strong opinions" that the forum heading describes, and I also tend to be rather candid and blunt in speech. I don't believe in sugar-coating anything, and much prefer honesty and openness to the more reserved or measured. I do, of course, leave out the more descriptive words, none of which would pass censor.

Ceremonious diplomacy has never been my strong suit... but then, I fully expect others to shoot straight from the hip, as well. I don't want to read a bunch of contrived replies liberally spread with honey. I want to know what people really think.

Everyone here has a slightly different way of expressing themselves. Part of being a regular member, as I see it, includes using decent reading comprehension and taking context into consideration... so as to understand each person's reply. It's not a sin to have to read something twice... or even three times... in order to grasp the sentiment of a response, or flavor of an opinion.

If people expect everyone to choose very measured responses to every subject, working the wording so it couldn't possibly be displeasing from any angle to anyone, I think they may be expecting too much. If this is the case, this might as well be any other forum, but not Hot Topics.


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RE: Politically Correct

Politically Correct is a term so overused and ubiquitous as to have become meaningless.

It's not even worth defining anymore, because it has become the refuge of the inarticulate and the stalwart of the last-word getters in discussions that may or may not have any political implications at all.

Like so much of the language of spin, it can mean anything, because it deliberately means nothing, but gets attached to everything.

Why not just try good manners instead?


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RE: Politically Correct

No one's mentioned "code words". Not so blatant on the surface - if one misses the drift.


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RE: Politically Correct

Huh.

I think intention is everything. I think I can tell if someone is being deliberately nasty or just said something kind of stupid.

I totally disagree that we shouldn't say something because one person had a problem.

I remember in Girl Scout camp in maybe 4th grade. A girl in my cabin said that if we were going to be her friends, don't call her "guys" as in "let's go, guys", she wanted to be called "gals". Fine. No big deal. But I don't think she should expect everyone to do that, nor do I expect her to want to be friends with people who can't make that simple request. It's up to the individual to decide if their feeling of insult is greater or lesser than their desire to get along with the other person (who may be trying, or may just be a jerk).

Here's something that may be flammable. The word "gay" and how it's used.

It comes from Germanic, and is agreed that from the 14-17th century the meaning shifted from primarily 'happy, carefree' to 'homosexual'.

Sometime in the 20th century it started being shifted from 'homosexual' to 'stupid/rubbish'. So from:

That's so gay! (happy, carefree)
That's so gay! (homosexual)
That's so gay! (stupid)

Now everyone here probably knows I'm not going around commenting on the gayness of anything. Mostly because I have a bigger vocabulary and it's a hot word. But some people say "that's so gay" and they're being jerks, and some are saying it because they haven't evolved. Some people say the "N" word because they haven't evolved, some because they're trying to be inflammatory.

Intention is everything. Someone with good intentions will be trying not to deliberately insult/harm another person and will immediately retract/apologize if they learn their actions did cause injury.

That's not the same as "I'm sorry if you took offense, I didn't mean it". That's "I'm sorry my words caused you pain, that was not my intention" and then considering choosing different words around that person.

Some white people can laugh about being honkies, some don't want to talk about it. Some black people with "N this and N that" all day long, while others will turn practically white if the N word is even mentioned. Some gay people will retort "that's so straight" and some will crawl down your throat if you say anything about the "G" word. Some lesbians don't want to be called gay, some gays prefer to be called homosexuals and some think "homo" is an out and out insult.

My mother HATED the term "ladies", or "girls" for adult WOMYN.

Consider your audience!!


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RE: Politically Correct

My mother HATED the term "ladies", or "girls" for adult WOMYN.

Your mother and I would have gotten along great!

Womyn power! (nothing ladylike about it at all, thank goodness!)

Kate


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RE: Politically Correct

You guys are hurting me. I like to think I'm educated and cordial to everyone I meet.
Are you telling me that when I meet a group of women on the walking trail and I say "Good morning, ladies." that I am somehow insulting them? They don't act insulted but maybe they are just putting up with my boorishness (?). I smile and they smile.
What would be a better greeting?


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RE: Politically Correct

steve - somebody is no doubt going to say to skip the "ladies" and stop with good morning and your smile.

"Gentlemen" on encountering two or more of them must be insulting, too then.

You present as a nice guy - bet the group is pleased to be acknowledged by you.


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RE: Politically Correct

Duluth, thanks. I think most people take things in the context that they are offered. When someone is approaching me that I've heard speak Spanish, it is no strain to say "Buenos Dias".
This is the South and the most insulting thing I can imagine would be to avert my eyes and not acknowledge a fellow traveler.
Obviously, someone on a cell phone, an out-of-breath jogger, or groups in deep discussion, get a pass.


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RE: Politically Correct

Even a smile or wave is acceptable, as I see it... after all, you're jogging. There's little time for pleasantries as people run past each other.

I would hardly be offended if someone said, "Good Morning, Ladies..." What's wrong with that? You're on a jogging path, moving quickly in opposing directions... I'd be happy that someone took the time to issue a greeting.

I think that there will always be those people who digest and analyze, or over analyze every word, looking for an offense. Some people aren't happy unless they're making others miserable.


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RE: Politically Correct

"No one's mentioned "code words". Not so blatant on the surface - if one misses the drift."

Got questions about that. "Dog whistles" too. Is there a primer somewhere where one can learn more about this? Seriously, what are people talking about when they use these words/phrases? I mean, I get the drift, but who makes the "code?" Who decides if there is a (silent) "dog whistle" being used?

This sounds very paranoid to be; also very judgmental. It implies that one knows what is going on in someone else's mind. Like "wink, wink", she's using "code" or a "dog whistle"; we all know what she really means but isn't saying (why not?).


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