Can't help on the grass ... I'm trying to eliminate all of it around the cabin so I'm thinking that clover is looking pretty darn good right now. For the shrubs, how bad is your deer population? Depending on how much they'll eat, you can probably use rhododendron or holly as either hedge or privet and juniper can also work. If the deer just aren't hungry and you are looking for late spring to fall coverage, you can always go the route of raspberries / elderberries and have more of an edible landscape.

As far as grasses go, buffalo grass is a warm season grass that might not be very successful, if at all, in your z5 location. Kentucky blue, especially in a mix, might be a better choice. There is an outfit in East Rochester, Crossman Seeds, that specializes in blends of turf grasses that are especially suited to our climate. Google their website. They have about 9 different blends, one might be right for you.

If the perimeter of your property is a mix of sun and shade, privet hedge might not be a good choice. I have a neighbor with exactly the same situation and she has been befuddled trying to get her privet to be full and lush. It just wants full sun really badly and isn't getting enough. In addition to makalu's edible suggestions, which sound quite intriguing, maybe blueberry as a hedge. Yews also tolerate shade pretty well, take a good shearing at any time of the year practically and just keep on coming. They live nearly forever.

In front of the windows, I would think maybe of a box hedge, which can be kept nice and low.