Well, I told my sister-in-law that I would come over today and plop down some bulbs for her in the flower bed. An hour long job at most, right? Not with a 2-year-old nephew and a sis-in-law who needs a lot more help than I was planning for today.
I no sooner had the bulbs in and she wanted to move the geraniums and snapdragons that her DH bought her for mother's day from the back yard where she had planted them to the raised flower bed her DH (my dear brother) built for her a couple of months ago.

Now let me tell you about the condition of said flowers. After sitting in flats for 3 weeks, she tried to plant them in the clay in the back yard. They looked pretty bad and had never even taken root, but I knew how badly she wanted flowers so I looked at the new flower bed in the front yard and knew there was no way, there were no worms in it and it was way too sandy. So off I go home for compost. She's digging up these sorry looking flowers and bringing them to me and I know they are gonna need major help. I tell her, "If they are green they are alive... with care they'll grow." I'm secretly crossing my fingers.

Austin (the nephew) is using the shovel to throw dirt in the air. "Austin, you will get dirt in your eyes," I say. He ignores me. I get him to help pick weeds instead. He's pretty good at it, neatly placing them into a pile. Then I ask him about being a big brother (SIL is pregnant with her 2nd). He ignores the question and tells me to pick more weeds. Then he goes back to throwing dirt. He gets dirt in his eye. He cries. His face looks like that of a chimney sweep.

In the meantime, I locate some irises that never bloomed this year, which I have been telling SIL for months are gorgeous and how she's going to love them when we separate them so they will bloom better, yadda yadda. I dig them up and break apart the first rhizome. Well, an iris borer and his friends had eaten through every single root of the irises and were still munching. I toss what's left of the irises. I go home and get some of mine for her. I plant them and we go back to the geraniums.

I show SIL how to add compost to each hole and mulch with it. I tell her to make DH get about 3 bags of it at the store and mulch with it, and to stop by the bait shop for nightcrawlers while he's at it, and to water the heck out of everything except the bulbs for a few weeks and to be patient. I am encouraging her that the flowers are not going to croak, that everything will be okay. I am, of course, hoping that I am not giving her false hope, because everything looks like crap. And it has been 5 hours since I got there and my back hurts... her DH had laid junky top soil in the beds over the existing grass, so I can only dig down like 6 inches before I hit... solid clay.

All the while, dear brother of mine is putting new siding on the house and cursing and yelling.

Austin gives the flowers their first watering. He sprays the flowers. He sprays the house. He sprays me, his dad, his mom, the portable phone and my purse and some of its contents. I ask dear brother for a beer.

My back is killing me. Now I only hope they follow my advice, because like I said, I know SIL really wants flowers. I just hope she takes the time to take care of them....