Just document all the problems and try to get the coordinator or extension agent to tackle the problem. If you do it other members who are not aware of the problem will feel obliged to support her and you may lose a couple of GOOD members. Al

Wow! diplomacy is the ticket there. and tuff to say what diplomatic tack to take. But must be something the entire group is aware of. friend steve

I really understand what you are going through. I was president in 2002, and we have one member that is exactly like you mention. I had to tell her to sit down and shut up on more than one occasion.

The following year, we had a new president that was personal friends with the disruptive member. Things got worse. Then the next year, the new president could not keep her quiet. And this year, she has gotten even worse.

As a result, many members have and are dropping out like you wouldn't believe it. She has scared so many members away.

OK, some say go talk to our agent. Well, I have, and many other members have to no avail. He can't keep her quiet either. She makes unilateral decisions for the whole group, and they just keep letting her get away with it. She treats the checking account like it is her own personal account. Trying to get a reimbursement check from her is like pulling teeth.

I wish that I had a solution for you, but I don't know what to tell you. As a result, I only now work the minimum hours in order to keep my certification. Life's too short to deal with people like her.

Good luck!

How about a shot of Round Up?

tee hee

Seriously, I think it's better to have one discontented ex-member than let her drive away many good members.

Weed her out!

Right on! Too bad the RU won't work on her. I'm sure she is immune to it by now. HA!

County Agents don't want to make waves, go to the state MG coordinator or enact a bylaw that allows the censure or removal of a disruptive member. Give her a warning.

Eddie/Barb
I think getting the bylaws adjusted is a smart way to deal with some of this problem. Certainly the money aspect - no reimbursements should be made unless the treasurer and President have agreed to the purchase before hand. Who signs for the checks should be stated in the bylaws anyway somewhere.
As for interupting speakers - could you institute a policy of no comments or questions until the presentation is over?

Get your program chair to list the programs for the full year ahead of time then confusion with the where will be avoided.
In essense tighten up your organizational strategies so that she cannot disrupt the running of the organization.
Has anyone actually sat down with the person and toldher that she is disruptive and causing people to leave?

Why not give her a job, such as writing a program to present to the public, such as Preparing a Raised Bed for Vegatables, Designing a Perennia Garden, Growing Herbs, Composting. You get the picture. That will make her feel important, keep her occupied and you might actually get something good that you can use.

Our disruptive member works her B**T off. She takes care of all the bookkeeping, is on about 6 different committees, helped draft the by-laws, has given some programs, etc.

Yes, she is a great "working member", but her "people skills" are terrible. We have already done all of the suggestions posted above, but nothing seems to work with her.

She is pushy, bossy, loud, rude, etc., and she just does not care who she offends. She has run off more members than I can even imagine.

When I was president, one member didn't have the required money to pay everything all at once. So I told her just to pay it on such and such date. We agreed. She was a great worker. Well, I later found out this disruptive member cornered her in the gardens and yelled at her for not paying the remaining $20.00. She had the girl in tears. When I found out I told the disruptive member that I would have gladly paid the $20.00 myself had I known that she was going to give her grief and just to leave her alone. Well that member managed to graduate and then dropped out right away.

Has anyone talked to her? Sometimes these people are very unaware of how they come across. If everyone complains behind her back, she still doesn't know. Talking should be tactful, and try to not make her defensive. If she's defensive she won't hear what you say and it will be just that you are out to get her. Soften her up by saying how much all of her work is appreciated. Anyone can talk to her who has the guts and the people skills to make her HEAR what you are saying.

It won't be easy, but you might be surprised that if made aware of how she comes across, she might change out of embarrassment. I'm sure she won't become perfect, but perhaps she'll become tolerable.

When I first met her, I tried to be friends. She and her husband live close by, so I invited them for dinner, cards, etc. many times. She is very bossy, and her husband calms her down.

She knows that she is bossy, and I've told her so, in addition to telling her to be quiet when she would interrupt people during meetings.

She does not care. I'm still cordial to her at meetings and when I see her in public, but like I said, many members were/are afraid of her and have quit since having to deal with her.

She is just a very high maintenance person.

Maybe it is time to use Robert's Rules of Order in your organization. Another control is to require a contract signed by all members requiring courteous behavior in all contacts with other members and the public, in all MG related activities. This gives the agent a handle to deal with someone like this. All they have to do is point out the relevant sections and suggest that if they are not happy with the way things are done maybe they would be happier in some other organization. Jessamine

Maybe you could tape her while at the next meeting and let her listen for the very first time... or buy a book entitled "HOW TO BE TACTFUL AND FIRM WITHOUT BEING OFFENSIVE TO OTHERS" Of course, the title is fictitious but you get the point. Maybe she could be caretaker of plants at the prison and the inmates wouldn't stand for her shenanigans at all! haha.

My 2 cents

I deeply sympathize. But the only insight I can offer is that you can be thankful this individual is just one member and not your AGENT. In the case of my MG org. the agent was tactless, abrupt, demanding and just plain rude; I once had to put my hand over the speaker phone when I was taking Hotline calls because she butted in on a call I was taking and started haranguing the poor John Q. Public person for being stupid enough to do such-and-such... not exactly the way to win friends and influence taxpayers! In a few short years she eroded the support of not just long-time MGS but the county political infrastructure we depended on for our existence -- no surprise, we got lopped off the budget suddenly one day and the whole office was out on its ear, salaried as well as volunteer. My advice? Do what you have to do -- honorable or un-, but get rid of that spoiler before you all regret it.

As I read through the posts, I see that every organization has some 'pests' Even if all the suggestions were followed these 'pests' don't think that these comments apply to them. I tend to avoid these 'pests' and try to make the newbie MG's more comfortable with my 'peopleskills'. One 'pest' put the fear of the phones into many of the new class. Many were afraid to say the wrong thing. I quickly helped these folks by saying think of the phones as talking with your neighbors and friends. If you don't know something, tell them and say you will find someone who does or when you find out you will get back to them either by mail or phone. A friendly face and attitude go a long way at keeping new members.

I believe it's the president's responsibility to protect the organization from this type of behavior. I had to deal with a similar 'helpful member' a while back. She was active, volunteered often and she also disrupted speakers, was rude with questions, etc. I finally asked another member of the board to be there as a 'witness' and I pulled the disruptive member aside and plainly and calmly told her that she was being disruptive (giving specific examples) and then told her that, as president, it was my responsibility to protect the integrity of our organization and the other members. I told her that she could either change her disruptive behavior or she was not to return to our meetings. I then offered to refund her annual dues. She was mad of course and she called several members trying to get other members upset with me but the majority of the membership was well aware of her antics and since I had the VP with me to witness what I said, there was hardly a ripple through the membership. The rude member did not return to our meetings and we haven't missed her a bit!

Film her in action. Nothing like being caught on camera and some people don't realize how they are until they see it from others perspective plus see the audience reaction to themselves.

I really like Jessamine's reminder to use Robert's Rules of Order.
However, being required to sign a contract 'requiring members to be courteous toward others' irks the heck out of me. You should always be polite. Guess the disruptive peoples mama's forgot to teach that lesson....

I think what Michelle did was the right thing and done the right way (have a witness) she is a strong person to take this responsibility on herself and I am glad it worked for her. I also liked Shanandoah's advice: "Do what you have to do - honorable or un- but get rid of that spoiler before you all regret it". I think this has been a tough topic to hash out but it was necessary and I am sure will be beneficial to many Master Gardener organizations. Remember any one can slip up once in a while but if they are so consistent that they are driving other members away it must be dealt with in a forceful manner.

I am still trying to deal with this member. She has gone over my head to try to change our July meeting. Our newsletter editor was smart enough to not take her seriously when she called. This member also called the state co-ordinator to try to get on the State Steering Committee. We changed the bylaws now so it is very plain that it is a nomination. Our advisor and I tried to set up a meeting to discuss the issues and this person could not make it. I wrote a letter documenting her behavior and was planning to send it out, but our VP thought it was too harsh so am trying again with another meeting. Another issue is that this member does not garden. Would you not think that in order to be a "Master Gardener" they would know better than to transplant into straight fresh farm manure? Any ideas on where to go from here before another MG rips her MG shirt off her back?
Barb

I have been perusing the whole MG forum for reasons I won't go into here.

All of you are mistaking these problem people as being unique to MG meetings. Let me assure you, they are not. EVERY volunteer organization has to deal with these people. Us "normal" people are flummoxed by these disrupters who seem to have agenda not in keeping with most of us. The real damage they do is to keep all the civilized folk away from meetings and doing useful things. An awful lot of people have better things to do with their time than be upset by these people who insist on being obnoxious.

Roberts' rules are very useful, but they are based on people behaving in a sensible manner. NOT TRUE.

If there is some way of isolating these people, then do it. Most of our organizations are not equiped to deal with psychopaths, or sociopaths, and that is what causes the most problems.

I would suggest to all of you simply this: if my experience in the District of Columbia is in any way relevant, you all have BY-LAWS, which some governmental level had to approve in order for you to be considered "non-profit." There is probably a phrase in there for members "In good standing." You may have to go through the trouble of voting someone NOT in "good standing" in order to rid yourselves of somebody determined to undermine the good works you want to do.

There it is.

Never, reward a negative personw ith a task/job provideing mroe power/authority!

Plus, you need to speak with your Coopertaive Extension Director in your COUNTY--extension agents and their programs must, as per the relationship between the land-grant university and the county governments, ALSO FOLLOW CONDUCT RULES FOR COUNTY EMPLOYEES. Thus, if any MG conducts hershelf in a manner that is contradictory to the mandated county codes of conducts for employees, you have a basis for a non-renewal of membership/involvement with the county-budgeted program.