Reed, I am sorry you're going through this, but you are a strong person and you will persevere and get through it. I am certain of that.

Of course, it is not easy. Life isn't easy. Gardening isn't easy either, though, and we watched you tackle gardening here in a tough state with lots of spirit and determination in what turned out to be a very challenging gardening year in the spring and early summer. I expect you will tackle this transition in your life in the same purposeful manner. After the storm clouds and rain, the sun always comes out and shines.....in life as well as in gardening.

Hang in there and keep looking ahead and moving forward. While your marriage, sadly, did not last, the fact remains that the two of you created a beautiful child together and having her is a gift, even if she isn't with you every day.

If it helps to know that we care, then surely you do know that we do care and I hope knowing that helps lift your spirits.

Dawn

Reed,

I know it's tough. Looking back on a marriage that ended up in a book story, I can say the toughest part is the grief.

Despite the personal grievances between spouses a broken marriage always brings grief. It's like cutting an arm or leg off. And that much will pass though it sucks.

I found time doesn't heal at all. I helps forget, but love ... love kindness and respect is what heals. I hope you can jump right in and fill those holes with love, kindness and respect from friends and family (not the romantic kind).

Blessings for you and your kids.

bon

Reed, I went through this sort of thing in 2010/11. I am now much happier, on my own.

It's tough, but hang in there.

Moni

Thank you for the update - I feel as though I've been gone from the board for a while, but it's good to hear.
I agree with pretty much everything that has been said. Doing what is best for your child, and for yourself (despite what has been done to you) is important.
Keep a good attitude, don't use your child as a sounding board, or someone to gripe to...take the high road, as hard as it is.
I'll be praying for you (as will others) that good will come out of this tough situation...eventually.

Sharon

Reed,
My heart hurts for you. Will be praying for you. I wish no one ever had to go through this.

George

I feel your pain too. I too went through a similar trauma last year. It is horrible unfair and totally stinks but fight to get your life back with new hopes and dreams. Start small and focus on all the positive, trust me I know how hard it is. I am just now coming out of it slowly and focusing on my grandson and gardening one hour at a time. days are too long...
Kim

Kim, I'm sorry you have had to go through this too. Hang in there. You have that precious grandson to enjoy and he'll ensure your days fly by. The pain will pass and you'll find joy again.

Dawn

So sorry to hear. Like George I hate it whenever I hear someone is going through this. Prayers for you and for your daughter. Dorothy

Hey Reed

I cant remember if you saw my earlier post or not. If you did You know I just went through this. It was final about 2 months ago. I know exactly how you are feeling. I have and had huge faith and trust in God that he would make things better. even if you arent a believer trust me that it does get better. The pain fades, the time goes by, youll have good days and bad days.but take comfort in knowing that this isnt the end of the world. If you arent dead you arent done. There is lots of life ahead and if you can see beyond the now it does look a lot better. Ironically I have a better relationship with my ex than I did in the final years of our marriage.

I think the single most important piece of advice is I can give is to spend as much time with the kids as you can. Find time to call them when you dont have them. I call my kids minimum 2-3 times per day when they arent with me. Equally I have them call their mom also when I have them. Help take them to school and events if you can. Even though its not "your "day to have them ,spending just a few minutes a day makes all the difference.

Email me if you need and advice or suggestions.

Just remember. It does get better.

Mike