...have stopped in to lurk a couple of times, but not cheerful enough to post anything.

...just caught your "Where's Jule?" thread on the other side, Kt, before it got bumped.

...Thanks Kt, and Sue for thinking of me.

Sunday morning we called for the rescue squad for my Dad. He was very sick, caughing up bloody mucus, very weak, couldn't get up out of his chair, delusional, etc.
Spent most of the day at the ER.

He was transfered to the ICU with a breathing mask strapped to his head, and he was breathing very labored.
In the evening after many tests were conducted, he was diagnosed with pneumonia in both lungs. His defibrulator/pacemaker also stopped working, because the battery had died. (Dad kept cancelling his follow-up appointments, which he SHOULDN'T have done!)

He was moved out of ICU to a cardiac floor for a day, but complications set in, and yesterday was moved back to the ICU with the breathing machine again.

I have been taking Mom up to the hospital every day after work and have tried to keep a cheerful disposition for her sake. But I am not sleeping well, and have been very sad lately, and frightened, with his very frail condition.

I keep thinking back to the days when I was a young girl, and all the strength and energy he had, watching him garden, build things, fish, hunt....I could go on and on.
But to see him in such a frail condition is heartbreaking.

He has had a new defibrulator/pacemaker "installed". (That's not the right word, but I can't think of the right word right now, since my brain's sort of frazzed lately.)
The hospital nurses are also giving him antibiotics for the pneumonia, plus medication to help rid his lungs of fluid.

Just got a call from Mom, saying that my brother was coming to pick her up & take her to visit Dad. So I will stay home tonight any maybe try & cook an actual meal for hubby, instead of "munching" for the last few evenings.

Good work on bumping the spammers...I just don't feel like helping with that at this point in time.

Thanks again for thinking of me...

Julie

It's never a pleasant thing, but it's good to know that something 'can' be done to help.

I hope you get some rest...it will make you feel sooo much better, and don't worry about your Dad(if that's possible), he sounds like a tough man and I'm sure he's in the best hands available to help him.

Great to hear from you, and keep us posted on when he is released and goes home.

Take care.

Kt

The fact that my Dad has congestive heart failure and diabetes complicates things.

Just got off the phone with my son who said x-rays were taken and they showed that the build-up in his lungs is starting to break up and looking better.

However, he isn't able to keep any food down, so they may have to tube-feed him because he's getting thinner, not getting any nutrition The mask was taken off for about an hour and a half, but he started gasping for air, so they put the mask on again.

Thanks Kt, for your kind words and good wishes.

I will update again when I can.

Julie

Take care, S.

Thanks for your kind words.
Dad has taken a turn for the worse, I'm afraid. Complications set in, and he was gasping for air, so the hospital called us at midnight. We picked up Mom and went to the ICU and saw that a breathing tube had been inserted down his throat. He was awake but very uncomfortable. He understood us, and occasionally nodded, or squeezed my hand. After he had been given meds to "relax", we left the hospital. I was able to get a couple hours of sleep before having to wake again to go to work.

We went up again to see him tonight. He is in a delicate balance, with an unbelieveable amount of tubes connected. Right now he is unresponsive, but resting peacefully. He looks so very frail...we just have to wait.

Thank you so much for your encouraging words...it means a lot to me.

Julie

I'm so sorry and you and your loved ones will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Take care.

Sue

The limit of people in an ICU room is supposed to be three, but there were seven of us for a while. Besides my Mom, myself, and DH, my brother and son were there, and Mom & Dad's pastor and his wife, whom I am very close to.

With my "work" friends, and you "cyber" friends giving me support, it helps me get through this tough time.

We just got word from DH's sister in Virginia that their Mom is also in the hospital in critical condition.

I know that God will not test you beyond what you can endure, but pretty soon He will have to pick me up and carry me.

Your kind words mean a lot to me, Sue.

Julie, signing off to try and get some much needed sleep.

Your Dad, you, and all of your family are all in my prayers every night.

P.S. We miss your cheerful posts here.

Kt

Your messages warm my heart.

Julie

My Dad had diabetes and congestive heart failure for the past few years, but when pneumonia hit, he developed complications:

Acute respiratory failure,
Pulmonary Edema,
Low BP,
Hole in lung,
Brain stem stroke,
Deep coma.

My mother, brother and I decided to have all life support removed yesterday. We had a wonderful, close visit time by his bedside for several hours, with all family members and spouses and Pastor last night.
He hung on for 10 & 1/2 hours before going home to be with the Lord at 2:00 A.M. this (Monday) morning.

There were only 5-6 hours between the two passings.

The Lord has indeed picked me up and is carrying me through these events.

I am (so far) strong for my Mom, and have taken this week off work, making all necessary arrangement for my Dad's funeral. My son and daughter have really stepped up to the plate to support my Mom. They both went to my Mom's house last night and visited, looking through photo albums and scrapbooks. My son stayed until 1:00 A.M. and my daughter stayed the night.

I have not yet felt the shock of these two events because I am so incredibly busy, and have not yet crashed. (That's the Lord's strength, not mine!)

Dad's funeral is Friday. I don't know yet when my MIL's funeral will be.

Oh, Kt,
I thought you might get a kick out of this:
My daughter (while looking through a pile of notebooks,) found some notes written by my dad about his grandfather. I happened to read a passage this afternoon.
His grandfather owned a farm for a time in northern Minnesota where he raised cattle and potatoes. He and his son (my grandfather) once drove 100 head of cattle through a small town with a large bull in the lead. The townfolk and storekeepers ran inside the building when they saw the size of the big bull with wide horns.
(Gee, maybe I have some cattle herding blood in my veins!)

At present, I'm O.K. but I might feel the full impact of my Dad's passing on Friday....would appreciate any and all of my good cyber friends' prayers.

Julie

You are at the top of my list of prayers tonight. God bless both families.

Bernie

I believe, as you said, that funerals are not only a wake up call, but are always the hardest part of anyones passing, probably because it is the very end of the deceased's earthly existence. It becomes final.

You will gradually recover from the shock, but never truly get over the loss of any loved one...that's human nature.

So..., Julie the Cowgirl!! Huh?? That story reminds me of a story I will tell you sometime, but mostly, it shows me that you can bring a smile to others(me) even though your heart must be feeling deep sorrow. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.

You and your family have been, and will continue to be in my prayers.

God Bless.

Kt

A thought came to me this morning...
...All we loved ones still back here on Earth are going through our grief over our losses...but I'm certain that the two of them are enjoying incredible peace without pain, and maybe the two of them are joking and comparing stories of how many tubes were attached to them.

(I sooooo look forward to the day when I will too experience no more pain and no more tears.)

Bernie, Sandy and Kt, your caring and supportive prayers mean soooooo much to me.

I can't thank you enough.

Julie

I am so sorry to hear of your loss.

That is so sweet that your children have stepped up to the plate and are helping your Mom get through this.

You and your loved ones will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sure this is going to be a very long, and stressful week, but I'm sure you will find the strength to pull through it and be strong for others too.

Sue.

DH is busy with his side of the family, planning for his mother's funeral, which will be Saturday morning.

I am finished with all plans for my Dad's funeral Friday morning.

This afternoon, Mom's Pastor came to her house and we had a wonderful time planning the program. We chose his favorite hyms, favorite verses, and chose comments to print in the program...some serious and some humorous.

I will spend tomorrow morning writing some thoughts and stories on paper for the sharing time during Friday's service. I don't know if I will be strong enough to get up in front of the congregation to share my thoughts, and if not, I will ask someone else to read for me.

Tomorrow my son, daughter and I are going to Mom's to put together a couple of picture posters for display Friday. It will be good for my Mom to be part of that.

I'm not stressed at all. Giving support to my Mom is not a heavy burden. The times after the funeral may be tough, after the reality sets in. But I'm going to try my best to keep a positive attitude for her.

I may have mentioned once on this forum that my mom always says, "Growing old is not for sissies!"

Again, I say thank-you everyone, for your continuing prayers.

Julie

Now will come the tough times ahead, as Mom tries to get used to a life alone.
We all intend to keep her busy and active, and many will be watching out for her.
She has many good neighbors, friends, and a close family.

I only wish I didn't have to work my day job, so that I could watch over her more closely. I plan to get out and finally get a cell phone to keep closer track of her.

Some time I will try and post some pics of my Dad, as a tribute to him. The posters we made for church viewing were a joy to put together, bringing many memories to life again.

Will attend MIL's funeral tomorrow.

Hope everyone is doing well...

Julie

Another chapter of life has closed and I have lost my endurance...the reality of the losses have hit full force...I am very sad... need to collapse for a while.

Will share a song that brings me comfort...
One of my Dad's favorite songs that he sang in the church choir...and that I had arranged in a finger-pickin version many years ago...that I will re-learn for playing in church again someday (I was asked to come back to his church (my former church) and play again for the congregation.)

In The Garden

We, the congregation, sang 'In The Garden' at Dad's funeral service Friday. The funeral service was recorded on CD for all family members to cherish forever.

Julie

I'm somewhat of an impath, so things seem to eat on me, even though they aren't close to me...strange huh?

Anyway, that is a beautiful song, "In The Garden". Your mention of the church choir reminds me of one of my uncles who sang in the church choir for 77 years, only to quit because he could no longer climb the stairs to the area where the choir sang. Him and his brothers were the ones who played in bands and were my inspiration for playing music.

Seems your recent experiences also bring back memories from my past...happy and sad, but none-the-less...memories. It reminds me of what I've seen and been through and what you must be going through now.

I wish you and your family all the best in this time of sorrow.

Kt

Anyway, re: I'm somewhat of an impath, so things seem to eat on me, even though they aren't close to me...strange huh?
No, not strange. It seems you have a 'gift' that not everyone has. And I'm sure you use that gift for the good of uplifting others just when they need it.

I will go through a grieving period (I shed plenty of tears today, for sure,) but I know I will also heal, given time.

It's so wonderful to have relatives who have inspired you musically. You can hold that inspiration in your heart forever. Music is such a great healing tool.

Thanks so much for your 'caring' thoughts and wishes.

Julie

Yes, I agree...given time, you will heal, but you will never forget, and it gets easier to talk about a deceased loved-one with a smile instead of feeling such strong sorrow.

If you didn't feel sorrow or cry, that wouldn't be normal. Keeping family and friends close at this time of healing, in my opinion, is the best medicine.

Hobbies that you truly enjoy such as playing music or photography, are also very helpful in the healing process.

Take care.

Kt

Kt

I have browsed here a couple of times, but haven't felt like posting much yet...I'm doing O.K. and Mom is doing better that I thought she would. She's busy cleaning!...throwing stuff out, and filling up trash bags for me or my brother to haul away every time we visit.

I'm also busy sending out thank-yous to people who have donated memorial gifts.

A woman at my parents' church had interviewed my Dad a few years ago about his experience at Pearl Harbor on Dec. 7 when it was bombed. She wrote up a story/report and gave me twenty copies on the day of my Dad's funeral. I have been mailing them along with messages to relatives around the country.

This is also a busy time (end of 1st quarter) at work and I have lots of reports to do.

Your photos are a joy to view!
I feel like they are a greeting card full of healing thoughts in the form of pictures.

Is the top photo of red Salvia?
Second photo Coreopsis with Monarch?
Third photo bloom start with a V______? I think they are sold as annuals here.
And what are the purple berries in the fourth photo?
The moon pics are so very lovely, esp. the close-up.
I also like the glowing gold/orange setting (rising?) moon.

Thanks so much, Kt for sharing your beautiful photos.
They have warmed my heart.

Julie

First pic is a Salvia coccinea aka 'Scarlet Sage'.

Second pic is a Verbesina encelioides aka 'Golden crown-beard' with a Monarch butterfly.

Third pic is a Purple Lantana...don't know the scientific name.

Fourth pic is of the berries of the American Beauty Berry bush, Callicarpa americana. The leaves can be rubbed on your skin as a mosquito repellant and the berries can be made in to a delicious jelly.

First two moon pics were taken out in the country. The third was taken before work one morning as I drove into town, and the fourth was taken on my way out to the country one evening.

Great to hear from you!

Kt

Are all those flowers pictured (above) still blooming in your area?
The only things still blooming in my yard are a few Mums, Asters, and Geraniums in my protected garage bed on the South side of the garage. It won't be long before a hard frost hits them and turns them to mush.

Wish I could grow the American Beauty Berry bush here, but it appears to be hardy only to zone 6. We do have a variety of Viburnums here that produce bluish berries, that attract birds.

Maybe if I have time this weekend I'll try and snap a few pics...it's been such a long time since I've used my camera. I miss taking photos.

I really like the clarity of the second pic of the moon, because I can see the craters! I think I remember you saying that craters show up better if you don't snap a photo of a full moon, but rather a gibbous moon.

The first time I viewed the photos, my laptop screen was tilted at such an angle that made the photos dark. This evening the screen is tilted forward a bit, and I just noticed the cattle! Looks like they're happily grazing.

I will try and post more often after I get caught up with a few things...helping Mom straighten out several financial issues...good grief, it makes me realize that I should get my own affairs in order!

Julie

There's always some flowers blooming even during the coldest months here.

The original pics are more crisp and clear, but I always make the pics smaller for loading here and they lose some sharpness in doing so.

Not sure whose cattle those are. They are on the opposite side of town from my house, and that is in a rice field that is in rotation now and used for cattle grazing.

You are very considerate to be taking care of others before yourself and at your expense. More people should be like you.

Kt

...and that is in a rice field that is in rotation now and used for cattle grazing.
RICE FIELD??? I didn't think rice could be grown in areas where there is low rainfall.

...taking care of others before yourself and at your expense.
Oh, I'm not paying major expenses for anything Mom needs...just minor things. She's financially stable. What I meant before was that I'm helping her move assets around to avoid probate, etc.

While making final plans for her, it occured to me that we should start thinking about burial places for ourselves. I think we may take advantage of veterans' benefits and be buried in a Veterans Memorial cemetery when our time comes.

O.K. I don't want to dwell on that subject.

I'm taking Mom to church tomorrow, since she hasn't gone to a service in several months. It will be good for her to see her church family on a regular basis. She loves to sing the hymns, and knows many by heart.

Julie

I think Eagle Lake is(was) the Rice Capital of the World. Eagle Lake is a few miles down the road from here.

I know where I will be buried at, if my wishes are followed.

Church is a good place for those in need of healing.

Kt

We knew it was coming, because my aunt was in very poor health with a brain tumor, among other things.
Mom is the only sister left (middle one of three) and wonders why she is still here. She's sad, but still strong, knowing that there is a "reason" her time hasn't come yet.

I'm losing relatives in fast order here...goodness...but thank God they were all strong in their faith, so we are rejoicing that they are all home with the Lord, and pain free!

As for me, I discover a new pain every day, which reminds me that I need to get back to those stretching exercises!

Wake-up call: Don't waste time doing useless things that have no value in life. I find myself contemplating on whether or not my actions are worthy or worthless...even trying to filter out my thoughts, trying to concentrate on uplifting ideas, pure and good motives, honest and upright behavior, etc.

Oh goodness, God has got a lot of work to do on me!

Julie

I'm doing fine, and my Mom is doing fine. She comes from a family of strong faith in the Lord, and knows her sister is finally home with the Lord. In families of strong faith in their Lord and Savior, there is more rejoicing for lost loved ones than grieving. My cousin in Michigan sat for hours beside her mother, praying that God would take her from her wretched body. (My Aunt's brain tumor had progressed to the point where she didn't recognize her own family members, couldn't speak, and lost her appetite, and her will to live.) Oh, of course we miss them, as you miss your mom, but there is so much to look forward to - an eternity with our Lord!

Such a sad story about your pastor, but he shared a good message of precious joy and thankfulness, something we all need to focus on in times of loss.

Wow! Your mom lived a long life here on Earth! How wonderful that you were able to share many, many years together! One of my mom's prayer-chain friends is 94 and still going strong...uses a cane, doesn't drive, but still has a sharp mind and a loving heart...always grasps my hand in both of hers whenever I see her and talk with her..and has a twinkle in her eye that makes her look like she's 29!

I do worry about my Mom living alone, but she doesn't want to move out of the house that Dad built for her. We (my brother and I) keep close communication with her every day, and I'm over there 3-4 times a week to help her in any way I can. But I want to look into a medical alert button just in case she falls. She still does laundry, walking down and up the basement stairs, and she still drives (only in dry weather though.)

Thanks for thinking of me, and thanks especially for your prayers:)

Julie

There's always a bright side or positive side to every sad situation. Keep your chin up. I think you are doing fine under the adverse circumstances.

My Mom came from a family of 11 siblings, so those alone account for a lot of losses. My Dad had only two brothers before his Mom had problems, but the number of great uncles and aunts makes for a huge family. I've been a pall bearer numerous times.

I've lived with pain most of my life, but it gets worse and more numerous as I get older. I have a high tolerance to pain(thank God), but I agree, there seems to be new pains on a regular basis. I too need to exercise more...one of these days...

Knowing that I made a difference in someone's life at some point, seems to be the greatest feeling for me. I had a friend of mine's daughter come up to me the other day and thank me for taking them fishing when her and her sister were kids.

We all went out to our place in the country where we have a 4 acre tank and they had a blast. I drove them and their parents through the woods later that night and told them we were looking for bigfoot. They were sooo scared. They have never forgotten that and want to go fishing there again...I guess they want to re-live old memories and make new ones.

Being forgotten is a sad thing...making someone remember you is a happy feeling.

Kt

And thanks for sharing the fishing/bigfoot story...what a blast for a couple of kids. Yes, I know the good feeling you get when someone shares their appreciation for what you've done for them. That feeling is priceless!

You have a very "giving" heart!

Julie