Shop Products
Houzz Logo Print
melvalena

Cranky Hubbies --there is hope.

melvalena
16 years ago

Ladies, there is hope for those of you with hubbies who take no interest in your garden efforts. In the last few weeks my Hubby has been making nothing but positive comments on my efforts and is constantly asking what is this or that called. He lamented that its going to take me years at the new house to get it up to this level of lushness. (it won't though cuz now I have a clue what I'm doing and what works and what doesn't)

He's even quit digging up what he calls 'weeds or trees'. (which aren't)

He came home last night and sat out on the back porch for a while. Then announced he wants to raise our asking price.

I asked him why and he said: "because they get all this. No one else has this yard". I was floored!

Then he told me to take pictures of everything and catalog it so when we move I'll know what I had and can replace it.

This from a guy who has poo poo'd, made fun of, castigated, sabotaged me with a spray bottle full of Round Up, and complained about any expense associated with my efforts. :)

Up until about 7 years ago, the yard was his. I had no interest or desire. I now understand that he was jealous.

He is so proud of what has evolved and impressed that I haven't spent the kind of $ he was spending when he was doing it!

I still have to do it all myself, but I don't have him teasing me or killing things behind my back. :)

He's even looking forward to a new house and watching me go to town on the yard!

Comments (12)

  • carolann_z8
    16 years ago

    That's good that he finally gave you the credit you deserve. Sometimes the men like to act so macho when they're just teddy bears.
    My DH surprised me by giving me advice on plants and gardening. I never knew he had such good ideas till we started gardening together. Hanging out in the yard is one of the best times we spend together.

    Are you selling your house yourself? You should get comps and then maybe add some to the price for the yard.

    It seems like houses are selling pretty fast lately. At least in my area they are. My son sold his in about 3 weeks.

    Let me know when you get moved in your new house and I can give you some plants to get you started.

  • melvalena
    Original Author
    16 years ago

    We've all ways bought and sold our own houses. But now our son is a new (little over a year) realtor so we're letting him handle (most) things.

    We've been watching our area and prices in the neighborhood for years, so we have a pretty good clue what things are going for. Houses with in a block of us have been selling pretty fast, if they are kept up and occupied. The empty, or repoed, and ugly ones sit for at least a year or more until the bank cleans 'em up and updates the insides. Then they go with in a few months.

    We'll see how it goes. We should be market ready in a few more weeks. I'm still out there planting seeds and moving things around to make it look the best I can for the summer.

    I'll be making a list of the plants I need/want starts of once we get the house sold and I pot up what I can with out destroying the yard. I've already been moving some stuff to my son's yard so I can get it back when we get our new place and I have what I'm calling my nursery bed on one side of the house that I plunk stuff or set pots of things that I want to take with me.

    I'm just amazed at the change in Hubby. Getting rid of most of the black nursery pots certainly changed how he sees things around here.

  • trsinc
    16 years ago

    That is so good! It's nice to be able to share the things you love with the ones you love. It's common, I think, that women who garden have husbands who don't. Strange.

    Good luck to you with your house sale and the new home. If you were closer I could share some stuff.

  • bo_berrin
    16 years ago

    Melvalena, that's such good news! I really needed to hear that right about now. Thanks for the hope!

  • mikeandbarb
    16 years ago

    That is really good and I know it makes you feel better.
    My DH wasn't impressed with me putting in beds and planting so much in the back yard either. He didn't see anything wrong with the way it was before LOL, just grass two trees and a million red tips. Ok, it was 20 but down to 10 or something like that.
    Then this year he told me what a great job I did, he has plants that he likes and others he's not to fond of and he too has been asking me what plant is what.
    It really makes it worth it once it starts coming all together. If I could hire someone to come in and do some of the really hard work it would go a lot faster.

  • pjtexgirl
    16 years ago

    My yard was a disaster. Especially the back. My DH has been waiting for me to make it look good. I remember when he couldn't figure out why I insisted on spending large amounts of time in the heat babying my plants along. Once the garden(where we were before) matured he suddenly got it!
    I'm glad your DH finally saw what you were doing! PJ

  • vjcamp
    16 years ago

    I don't have that problem. Cranky wife ( there is no hope LOL) sometimes, but hey, that is one good reason to go outside and work in the garden.

  • jolanaweb
    16 years ago

    Melvalena, good for you and wow about DH
    Mine has never questioned the garden in anyway, lol
    In the past it was just *my deal* then people started asking him questions about different plants, how long does it take to mow out here, etc, lol (which was weird in some ways, assuming *he* had done it)
    He would always have to turn to me and ask or tell them, ask jolana.
    I think that is what did it, hehehe
    Now he wants to help and has pretty much taken over the mowing, BUT I have to do some or he would have to *fluff* the whole yard, hehehe
    Congrats on DH's turnaround, it makes gardening even more special if you can share it with your spouse, lol

  • carolann_z8
    16 years ago

    "In the past it was just *my deal* then people started asking him questions about different plants, how long does it take to mow out here, etc, lol (which was weird in some ways, assuming *he* had done it)"

    Isn't it funny how everyone always assumes the DH does all the hard work.
    Everytime someone sees my big garden out back they say something like he sure has worked hard on this or wish I had a DH that would do this for me.
    When I'm the one that laid all the big stones for the path, planted all the roses and plants and spread most of the mulch.
    He did build me two arbors and did his share but I worked as hard on it as him..

  • justintx
    16 years ago

    Hey, Mel -
    That COULD be 'Cranky spouse'. I caught flak (and other 4 letter words) over the first $700 when we moved into this 'nekked' yard, but DW really enjoys it now. Isn't that one of the rewards of gardening - when others get enjoyment from it too? Sounds like you've done a notable job with your place. Best wishes getting it sold!!
    J.D.

  • momofjandj
    16 years ago

    Since I am new to gardening and have only put in one small flower bed, I can't say my DH has complained alot. Although, he was none too happy when he had to help dig and add in shale and compost...even though it only took him about 30minutes...
    When I first decided to make gardening my new hobby, I think he kind of laughed it off. But now, I'm always looking at websites for flowers, gardening magazines, this website everynight, he asks if this is payback for me having to hear about flyfishing all the time! LOL
    Now that our flowerbed is growing and I have a ton of potted plants, he is warming up to the idea and asked when I was going to do something to the side of the house!!! Gotta love it! I said, "Show me the money!" LOL

  • carrie751
    16 years ago

    My DH leaves ALL the gardening to me (this is very acceptable to me), except for the heavy stuff. Then, either he does it, or I hire someone to help. This works out so well for me. If you are "paying" someone to help, it is a given that you can tell them how you want it done. LOL.