. . . a big hairy sasquatch. He thought he had spotted one of those big hairy humanoids a week earlier, in the woods behind the garden, just beyond the wild apple tree. But now he was sure. He excitedly called his friend Lisa and asked her to help him track the creature.

As they set out on their quest, the snow began to fall again. Soon it came down so heavily that they could no longer see the forest for the flakes. As they huddled in the shelter of a big pine tree, they heard and unearthly shriek. . . .

It was Duncan's younger brother wearing his big foot mask. A skinny but tall fellow taller then Duncan despite his younger age. While Lisa pulled the mask from his face and frowned in anger but smiled in relief he barked ,"You guys are sure in trouble .... it's two hours past dark and we better get home ... dinner is waiting ! "

.....

That's the opportunity Sasquatch was waiting for. "Stupid Humans!" he muttered as he pounced on them and carried off Lisa to his garden in the alpine fastness of the North Cascades.

My wife says not to give up my day job LOL .....

Duncan told the policeman investigating Lisa's disappearance. "What does that have to do with the kidnapping?" asked the officer, before arresting Duncan in his garden. . . .

"It must cabin fever, made me say it," Duncan replied, "Did you see any tracks, Dunc." his bother asked.
"Well," Duncan said stretching out his fifteen seconds of fame,"I saw a big foot and a flat foot and ...

......"This", he pointed to the foot prints in the snow. Two tracks, one on either side of the prints that looked to be like tire tracks, but it was hard to tell exactly what might have caused them as the snowfall was getting heavier by the minute. "And that's not all", Duncan said as he reached into his pocket pulling out a piece of parchment with a note scribbled in calligraphy. He handed it to the officer and asked,"What do you make of this?" "It looks to be some sort of riddle", the officer replied after giving it the 'once over'. It read: I HAVE THE MASS, YET WIEGHT WILL NOT BE FOUND. EXACTLY HALF OF ME IS ALWAYS BRIGHT. ALMOST, THAT IS. AS WELL, EXACTLY HALF OF ME IS CLOAKED, THE EYE IS TRICKED AGAIN. THINK THEM THE WINDS YOU MAY; BUT I KNOW RIGHT, THE SHORES DO TOO, THEY BREAK THEM HERE AND THERE. SO ONCE AGAIN, I ASK OF YOU MY NAME.

After a moment of silence...

they noticed that it had become dark and a full moon lit up the parchment revealing...

"Bloody Hell !!!!!!!" Duncan cried. His throat constricting, he muttered the words barely audible, "That's the coat of arms of my family's sworn enemy."

Macbeth, the leek-eater, and his bloody clan. . . .